I'm not thick. I know it doesn't sound like much of a boast, but I'm pretty competent at this whole adulting lark. But it appeared that I had forgotten a 4 digit number I'd set up less than a minute ago! The security guard smiled wearily at me, "It happens to everyone!" She said. … | Continue reading
It's always slightly weird when entertainment transfers from one medium to another. The actors on stage never look like the characters you imagined when you read the book. A prog-rock concept album loses its grandeur when transferred to 27 part Netflix series. And the subversive … | Continue reading
I wish I could remember who recommended this book to me. It's not something that I'd usually choose to read, but it was surprisingly interesting. How did Romans take a shit? That's at the heart of this book. Not just the how - but the why, the when, and the where. How did foreign … | Continue reading
The QWERTY layout is, I grant you, an illogical mess. I'm happy to hear your arguments that Dvorak is the one true way. Or that Colemak is several percent faster. But QWERTY is a standard now. Everyone uses it on their laptops and phones. It is used everywhere. Except, it turns o … | Continue reading
The bad news is - this book isn't released until September 2023... The good news is - I have an advance reader copy. So I get to revel in it now! I appreciate that you might not consider that much of an upside. But sucks to be you, I guess? Scalzi's writing reminds me why […] | Continue reading
Apple have an Android version of their Apple Music app. The Amazon FireStick runs Android. So you can run Apple Music on the FireStick, right? WRONG! The official advice is to link Apple Music to the Alexa Skill - with its justifiably low review score. But we're hackers, we can d … | Continue reading
The "Baader-Meinhof phenomenon" is that weird experience where you learn of a new word or phrase and then suddenly see it crop up everywhere. At the time of writing, the Wikipedia entry for "frequency illusion" said: The name "Baader-Meinhof phenomenon" was coined in 1994 by an o … | Continue reading
I am not non-binary. I am cis-gendered - and pretty much the definition of "default male". And yet, whenever I encounter a form which has it as an option, I select my title to be "Mx". I've even stopped my usual practice of choose His Excellency - much to the dismay of my postie, … | Continue reading
I recently downloaded a single-page HTML template for a project I was working on. I wanted a good-looking scaffold to help me getting running quickly. The code had an attribution licence which I was happy to comply with. I ended up removing about a whole bunch of the HTML that I … | Continue reading
I want to detect if a web browser is running on a device which is capable of placing a telephone call. Is that possible? I'm going to go with a cautious "no - not quite". Although there are several proxies which get you part of the way there. Here's a link to a telephone number [ … | Continue reading
I was trying to install a new open source project and was having a hell of a time. Nothing seemed to be working despite me following the tutorial to the letter. I was getting the most bizarre error messages and was on the verge of quitting to become a goat farmer, when I threw on … | Continue reading
There's an old joke about a man who reads his morning paper in bed. If he's not listed in the obituaries, he gets up to start his day. A few months ago I was checking my email in bed (always a bad idea) when the vanity alert I have for my name appeared. Google took […] | Continue reading
This is annecdata - not a serious academic study. Adjust your expectations accordingly. When I first got online, the World Wide Web was still in its infancy - so CompuServe was my gateway to the Internet. I loved their well organised chat room. A couple of clicks and I could be d … | Continue reading
As we head unto an AI dominated future, the Turing test will probably become less like a Voight-Kampff test and more like a warzone Shibboleth. Yesterday, I asked the Alexa to set a timer. "What do you want to name your timer?" She It asked. "Bow," I replied. "Bow timer set," it … | Continue reading
It's not often I go to a movie premiere. And it's less often that I go to a movie premiere of a film starring my mum! Straight 8 is an intriguing idea for a film competition. Film-makers have exactly one roll of Super8 film - which runs to about 3 minutes. The only editing they [ … | Continue reading
The good folks at InfiRay have sent me their latest Infrared camera to review. It is tiny. It's smaller than a normal USB stick and barely weighs anything. Shove the USB-C protrusion into your Android phone, launch the app, and... nope - that's it! Pretty much instantly plug and … | Continue reading
I have a screenshot of my phone's screen. It shows an app's user interface and a photo in the middle. Something like this: If I set the compression to be lossy - the photo looks good but the UI looks bad. If I set the compression to be lossless - the UI looks good but […] | Continue reading
Yet another compendium of Chinese sci-fi stories - and there are some great stories in this collection. There are also some essays about what makes Chinese science fiction Chinese. Based on my (limited) experience, I'd say one of the defining characteristics of the Chinese SF I'v … | Continue reading
I finished watching Frasier over lockdown - the miserable tale of a self-destructive incel - and decided to continue watching old American sitcoms. I thought Cheers was a hellish dystopia populated with malicious tormentors. So now on to M*A*S*H. It's hailed as a masterpiece of c … | Continue reading
Due to a strange mix-up with an eBay order, I've come into possession of these rather quaint anti-suffragette postcards. I hope it is obvious that I am pro universal suffrage. What amuses me about these cards is how emotional they are! These aren't dispassionate arguments designe … | Continue reading
I once described my ideal coding environment to a colleague as "telneting directly into prod and damn the consequences!" I jest. But only a little. When I build for myself I treat best practices and coding styles as harmful. Chaotic evil but, hey, it's only myself I'm hurting. An … | Continue reading
Well, this is a glorious mess! The puppetry is astounding. The grey-clad puppeteers manipulate their charges with grace, precision, and joy. The work is so much more intricate than, say, Avenue Q. The mannerisms of the Tom Cruise doll are perfectly executed, with subtle moments o … | Continue reading
Tom Dolan has an excellent blog post which touches, in part, on comparative cost. If you're working for, say, a TV company - then you know exactly how much an hour of TV programming costs on average. If you want to do something like build a website, it's quite natural for people … | Continue reading
There's no one dafter than the previous owner of your property. Over the years we've found dodgy wiring, horrificly bodged plaster, and things plumbed in backwards. We've started re-doing our garden recently. The hideous decking was quickly rotting away and needed removing. But w … | Continue reading
I'll cheerfully admit to only having a hazy familiarity with the play (it's the one with twins that isn't 12th Night, and with the shipwreck which isn't Tempest, and with the annoyed money-lender which isn't Merchant of Venice... wait... perhaps I have seen it in aggregate!) On t … | Continue reading
I am using Auth0's Symfony library to allow users to log in with their social network providers. It works really well. Using this firewall configuration, a user who visits /private is successfully taken through the login flow and I can then use $this->getUser() to see their detai … | Continue reading
I used to work in a call centre for a Very Big Company. Every week, without exception, we'd get a bunch of new starters to train. And every week, without exception, a newbie would be fired after looking up a famous person's data. This was in the days before GDPR. There was a lot … | Continue reading
If you hang around with computerists long enough, they start talking about the Semantic Web. If you can represent human knowledge in a way that's easy for computers to understand it will be transformative for information processing. But computers, traditionally, haven't been very … | Continue reading
Suppose you are sent a link to a website - e.g. https://example.com/page/1234 But, before you can access it, you need to log in. So the website redirects you to: https://example.com/login?on_success=/page/1234 If you get the password right, you go to the original page you request … | Continue reading
I was browsing the web recently when I can across this utter horror show of a font. Warning, not for the faint of heart. The thing is, I can't adequately describe why I - and many others - find it so disturbing. In all my years of reading English, I've never found a font which [… … | Continue reading
I've never heard such whooping and hollering from a Bloomsbury Theatre audience. When Rachel Bloom prances on to the stage it is like seeing a revivalist preacher work the faithful. It would have been so easy for Bloom to rest on her laurels and give a "best of Bloom" revue - the … | Continue reading
When I was... Oooh... 8 or 9 I entered a "count the number of spots on the giraffe" competition one summer holiday. Apparently I was the only child who noticed that there was a spot on the tail, so I won a YEAR'S SUPPLY of Cadbury's Curly Wurlys. Nothing I've ever won since has l … | Continue reading
Sometimes you learn the most from failures! I wanted a element where the were laid out in a grid. I nearly got there. It's possible to have the s in a horizontal row - but only on Chrome and Firefox. Here's a quick fiddle showing the results: As you can see, it's […] | Continue reading
I'm a reasonably adventurous eater - but a rather underwhelming cook. So I thought I'd give these "posh ready-meals" a go. The pitch is simple. GreenChef will send you a big box of ingredients and a bunch of recipes to follow. You get exactly 175g of tomatoes, a precise number of … | Continue reading
Many years ago, Google applied for the .zip Top Level Domain. ICAAN, in its infinite wisdom, granted it. And now, I think, bad things are going to happen. You see computers try to be helpful. They see you wrote "visit example.com" and autolink the thing which looks like a domain … | Continue reading
Doing vocal impressions is hard. Doing them while singing is even harder. But Chirstina Bianco does it effortlessly, backwards and in high heels. I remember seeing the Forbidden Broadway show decades ago - Bianco is an alumna - and being slightly confused by all the "inside baseb … | Continue reading
This pissed me off and I couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong. So I'm blogging about my ignorance. Imagine you're using Symfony and Doctrine to access a database. You are using prepared statements to prevent any SQL injection problems. There are two main ways of doing this … | Continue reading
I couldn't work out how to use Route Aliasing within my controller. I couldn't find anything in the documentation about it. But, thanks to a StackOverflow comment it is possible. Suppose you want users to be able to access a page using /users/123 and /people/123 - with both route … | Continue reading
The journalist David Pierce has written a piece about the birth and (almost) death of Google's AMP. Regular readers know I have been a vocal critic of AMP even when I was serving on its advisory committee. Nowadays, well, I can't remember when I last saw an AMP page (yay Firefox! … | Continue reading
The Yamaguchi Foodstuffs Conglomerate emphatically denies causing tumours in vegetables. They did not "give a beansprout cancer". That would be irresponsible and against their 250 year commitment to responsible bio-agriculture development. Every culture has their own version of G … | Continue reading
After three years of constant abuse, my once pristine laptop keyboard now looks like this: My options were: Ignore it. Scrape off all the paint and replace with translucent stickers. Buy a new keyboard. Even if I were happy with the aesthetic of a hard-worn keyboard (I wasn't) th … | Continue reading
It is hard to get people excited about VR. Even at its best, it is an isolating experience - that's why Zuck is pushing the social features of The Metaverse so hard. But, worse still, it's hard to show people what the VR experience is like. If your friend buys a 4K laser projecto … | Continue reading
This is an important and informative book. Unfortunately, I did not get on with it at all. The book is an ambitious look at the philosophy of science viewed through a unique lens. What is temperature? How do we define what freezing and boiling are if we don't have a thermometer? … | Continue reading
I am (what could charitably be called) a Star Wars fanboi. When I was a nipper, there were only 3 Star Warses1, and I wore out the video tapes watching them repeatedly. When the Timothy Zahn books came out, I was starved of new content and devoured them eagerly. And... that was p … | Continue reading
I've been reading various entrepreneur books and blog posts1. One thing they all emphasise is that success often comes from finding a problem that you yourself would pay money to solve. And that's a problem for me. I don't tend to want to spend money solving problems. I'm not cla … | Continue reading
I'm just getting started with Symfony, so I'm blogging some of the weird things I'm finding. Symfony has a concept of Cache Contracts. You can call an expensive / slow / intensive operation and immediately cache the result for a specific time period. Next time you call the operat … | Continue reading
I'm just getting started with Symfony, so I'm blogging some of the weird things I'm finding. I want to use Doctrine dbal to search a database for a partial match. For example searching for "smith" should find "blacksmith" and "smithy". I have a prepared statement like this: $quer … | Continue reading
It was only after I started editing my MSc down to its prescribed word-count, that I finally understood the phrase Kill Your Darlings. I spent ages writing florid prose, only to realise it was needless verbiage. The delete key was hammered mercilessly. But... As all fans of Jaspe … | Continue reading