Hamlet / “The Deal” The actors re-enact the famous play-within-a-play scene. Hamlet watches the King’s reaction, desperate to see whether Claudius killed his father. HAMLET: What was that look? CLAUDIUS: What look? I gave a look? HAMLET: I know that look. That’s the look of a man … | Continue reading
I Know What’s Best for You: Stories on Reproductive Freedom, edited by Shelly Oria, is a multigenre anthology with a focus on the crisis of reproductive rights in the United States. The book’s international supplement features sixteen additional works of fiction, nonfiction, and … | Continue reading
“Elon Musk struck a deal on Monday to buy Twitter for roughly $44 billion… Mr. Musk has said he wants Twitter to fulfill its ‘societal imperative’ as a platform for free speech.” — The New York Times, 4/25/22 - - -Hi there, I’m Elon Musk. I’m mostly known for rockets and cars, bu … | Continue reading
1. Holding very still inside a closet that is wide open. 2. Inside her pediatrician’s office, where she has received nearly two dozen childhood inoculations but is still ineligible for a COVID vaccine. 3. Lying facedown in the middle of the living-room rug, whispering to herself, … | Continue reading
Once there was a man named Job. Job was a man of virtue and moral fortitude, and thus God had blessed Job with a beautiful wife, good health, a 2,000-square-foot apartment in the Upper West Side, and a refurbished Xbox. Now there was a day when the sons of God came to present the … | Continue reading
Thanks to decades of inaction, climate change is now an inevitable reality. However, there is still time to mitigate the brunt of the damage, and in the face of overwhelming scientific evidence, we must be bold. That’s why, as mayor, I’ve set an ambitious (but achievable!) goal f … | Continue reading
I Know What’s Best for You: Stories on Reproductive Freedom, edited by Shelly Oria, is a multigenre anthology with a focus on the crisis of reproductive rights in the United States. The book’s international supplement features sixteen additional works of fiction, nonfiction, and … | Continue reading
- - -Today we are kicking off a new project. Every week we will be running supplemental pieces to I Know What’s Best for You: Stories on Reproductive Freedom, an intersectional collection of essays, fiction, poems, plays, and more, that explores the crisis of reproductive rights … | Continue reading
Scientists in the lab face each problem open-minded, free of bias, and with a unique style that says, “I don’t care what people think of me.” Lab protocol requires that notes on an experiment are meticulous, detail-oriented, and hella rad. Everyone uses Kelvin instead of Celsius … | Continue reading
After two years of remote-only work, we’re excited to begin our transition back to the office. With that said, we know that remote work is here to stay, so we’re happy to announce an innovative hybrid work policy. Employees will be required to be in the office only two days a wee … | Continue reading
“Hours after a federal judge struck down a nationwide mask requirement on airplanes, trains, buses and other public transportation on Monday, the country’s largest airlines said they would stop requiring masks, ending a practice that had been in place for most carriers for nearly … | Continue reading
Acquisition Then: Your parents are out for the afternoon, so you page some idiot named Lunchbox. In your eyes, he looks as ancient as the sun, but he’s actually only twenty-three. You buy an eighth of mostly shake, and frown at the bag while Lunchbox rifles through your bookshelf … | Continue reading
Thank you to every student who auditioned for Eastborough High School’s production of Bye Bye Birdie! I see each musical as an amazing opportunity to turn developing young talent into the bright stars of tomorrow. Thanks to the literally hundreds of students who turned up at audi … | Continue reading
Hey, thanks for squeezing me in. But before you begin strategically rearranging my graying spots to mask my bald spots, can we first change the music? I asked the girl up front for some classic rock, but this is Soundgarden. This mistake keeps happening. Yesterday I was in a wait … | Continue reading
I Among twenty blinding tabs, The only thing still loading Was Blackboard. II I was of three tasks, Like a class In which there are three assignments. III The Blackboard processed its ones and zeros. It was the backbone of my academic experience. IV A student and their grade Are … | Continue reading
“The Florida Department of Education announced Friday that the state has rejected more than 50 math textbooks from next school year’s curriculum, citing references to critical race theory among reasons for the rejections.” – CNN, 4/17/21 Here in the great state of Florida, we are … | Continue reading
Dear Future World Leaders, Hey. You’re in my Tuesday class, or maybe Friday. I have over a hundred students this semester, but I will treat each of you like you’re the only one. I promise. So, if you have questions, email me anytime. I’ll probably be awake. Speaking of being awak … | Continue reading
Wow, guys, this is deeply uncool. After all these years, I finally make it to a Passover Seder, only to find you polished off the only cup of wine specifically intended for me. I mean, it had my name engraved all over it, in two different languages! Kind of hard not to take that … | Continue reading
Blood: Insurance doesn’t cover routine blood work. Frogs: Roommate enters reptile phase. Lice: Rescue dog comes with rescue fleas. Flies: All first dates are hikes. Pestilence: Weird new foot pain. Boils: Adult acne. Hail: Hail in May, followed by intense bouts of climate anxiety … | Continue reading
Day 1 Good Friday, you ask? Not great. Died today. Very painful. Do not recommend. Saw Dad briefly and brought it up first thing. “All-powerful and You couldn’t have made it, I don’t know, smothered by puppies? No, it had to be nailed to a cross.” “Trust Me,” He said, “the mercha … | Continue reading
Reservations must be made for the exact number of people in your party. If there are thirteen of you, you are not allowed to make a reservation for twenty-six just so you can all sit on one side of the table. Speaking of which, your party must sit on both sides of the table. Cust … | Continue reading
And so, it came to pass that Moses was clocking out of his day job and heading off to his DoorDash side gig. For though he possessed multiple degrees and had been with his company for over a decade, he still labored under the combination of rising rent, inflation, and student deb … | Continue reading
A Relationship of Convenience Brandon Heineman and Stacy Schuld met on Facebook Marketplace. He was on a shoestring budget looking for a pullout futon for visitors, and she was on the verge of moving and just wanted it gone. He paid cash the next day and took it home. “I wasn’t u … | Continue reading
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. Nothing shall I want, Lord. Any minor inconveniences caused by The Change pale in comparison to the freedom I feel at this time in my life. Wait, maybe there is one thing. If it’s not too much trouble, I shall want my pre-menopausal body … | Continue reading
I can see you reading that copy of It, your trembling fingers turning the pages, and I know you’re really scared, but I’m going to need you to calm down. Let’s get on the same page here: something like a killer clown in the small town of Derry could never happen, because it takes … | Continue reading
To be… or (clears throat) NOT to be… uh… you know, THAT is the question, am I right? (knocks on table) Whether… or not it is… uhhhh… (arches eyebrows, snaps fingers) NOBLER, you see, more noble in the mind, yeah, tosuffertheslingsandarrowsof out…rageous (looks over glasses, three … | Continue reading
In the beginning, there were no toddlers. There were only babies. As babies, we had chubby little thighs and sleepy little minds. As babies, we could not speak or walk or point at doggies. The Gods sustained us day and night. Now we are toddlers, but still: we worship the Old God … | Continue reading
Dear Applicant: Earlier this year, we were proud to announce that the Muffy V. Ladygirl Fellowship for Literary Maidens would be open to nonbinary applicants. While we did everything in our power to get it right, we did receive some pushback on the application process. Comments s … | Continue reading
If I were bitten by a great white shark, I’d work it into every conversation I ever had for the rest of my life. “Have we met before?” “I don’t know. I’m the woman who was bitten by a great white shark. Does that ring a bell?” I’d milk it for all it was worth. Sharks don’t drink … | Continue reading
Boris Dralyuk is an LA formalist. It always feels surprising to say Los Angeles in the same breath as formalist. LA seems a place so steeped in its dream of casualness—and in the production of its own myth, the story of sun-bleached California—that the notion, in such a context, … | Continue reading
Congratulations, we’ve successfully installed your new toilet. I’m Gene, your Tushi technician, and—I hear you loud and clear: you desperately need to go number two. Let’s get you logged into your new toilet. No, I’m afraid you can’t “just go fast and then log into the toilet”—yo … | Continue reading
Okay, Hollywood, it’s way past time for the next batch of raunchy teen movie adaptations. And since we’ve already covered Shakespeare’s entire canon, next on the hit list are Greek Tragedies. Because nothing is hornier or more relevant to teens than plays written over two thousan … | Continue reading
Dear Drivers of Uptown Manhattan Who Honk as My Son Gets on His School Bus, First off, I want to thank you for a fantastic performance this morning! The symphony of horns, the yelling, the speeding, all made my son’s commute to school truly memorable. So memorable was your produc … | Continue reading
I’m in the Trader Joe’s frozen aisle, a section of the store that I love to peruse but hardly commit to. I’m frugal, and a firm believer in the notion that I can use my spice cabinet to make even the most rudimentary ingredients taste like one of these microwavable meals for a fr … | Continue reading
He was a young man who wrote jokes in a small apartment in Chicago and he had gone three-hundred-sixty-five days now without filing a tax return. He opened his laptop and launched the tax preparation software. “Santiago, let’s get started on getting you the biggest refund possibl … | Continue reading
This is the fourth installment of our new serial comic by cartoonist Nguyên Khôi Nguyễn, chronicling his and his wife Thảo’s attempts to start a family. You can read earlier entries here. - - - | Continue reading
Crew, I’m glad you could all make it to my barbecue. Now that I’ve said grace and we’ve all chugged eight Coronas, I can finally share my big, car-related news. Effective today, I, Dominic Toretto, will only be driving this certified pre-owned 2019 Honda Odyssey minivan. Quit lau … | Continue reading
Ben Estes, trained as a painter, is not a surrealist poet. Not exactly. And he’s not a poet of careless or relentless parataxis—one of the dominant modes of our age—but he manages to harness the movements and the energies of the surrealist non sequitur, living in his work just on … | Continue reading
Crew, I’m glad you could all make it to my barbecue. Now that I’ve said grace and we’ve all chugged eight Coronas, I can finally share my big, car-related news. Effective today, I, Dominic Toretto, will only be driving this certified pre-owned 2019 Honda Odyssey minivan. Quit lau … | Continue reading
Hi, rich guy here. Let me tell you all the ways you and I are the same. THE MORNING ROUTINE I put my pants on just like everybody else—aided by a pair of robotic butlers who ease me into the pants both legs at once. Then it’s time to deal with the kids. There’s no “rich person sh … | Continue reading
F. Scott Fitzgerald “Aaaaaaah aaaaaaaaaaaah ah ah ah ah aaaaaaaaaaah ah aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.” Emily Dickinson “Aah aaaaaaah – ah aah aaah – ah aaaah - Aah aaah aaah ah aah aaaah -” James Baldwin “Aaah. Aaaaaaaaaah aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah aaaaaaah. Aaaaaaaah. Aaaaah aaaaaah aaaaaaaaaaaaaa … | Continue reading
You have to watch this painfully bleak show I’m binging. The episodes are about an hour long, and the themes are pretty dark. It’s a parable for the decline of the American empire, with a lot of heavy-handed commentary about the alienating effects of social media and the hypocris … | Continue reading
One way into Dana Levin’s Now Do You Know Where You Are is music. A kind of dancing, doubting line—always intensely, beautifully doubtful—a line William Carlos Williams might’ve admired, but one that also veers into rhyme when it feels like it: “One says No and the other / says n … | Continue reading
Seed of my loins, hear me! You now read the words of Temüjin, uniter of Asia, horse master, and possibly your father’s father’s father’s father’s father’s father’s sire. After ordering my concubines to spit my semen into a small vessel, my swiftest courier delivered that vessel t … | Continue reading
I had a whole gaggle of 100-point bucks in my sights, sleeping peacefully on their feet, like cows. The way they were lined up, I could take down t... | Continue reading
I’m a reasonably mild-mannered, agreeable person who tends to get along with everyone. But if you disrespect me in any way—watch out! I undergo a terrifying transformation into a mild-mannered, agreeable person who makes a gesture of disapproval so subtle you’re extremely unlikel … | Continue reading
Hey, you pompous little asshole, I was sleeping. Do you know how precious few hours of sleep a middle-aged woman gets in a night? I had finally reached a REM state after two hours of lying awake in my perimenopause-induced anxiety fog, and you’re going to wake me up because you t … | Continue reading
This is the third installment of our new serial comic by cartoonist Nguyên Khôi Nguyễn, chronicling his and his wife Thảo’s attempts to start a family. You can read parts one and two here. - - - | Continue reading