I made my art the way I lived my life—fast, unpredictable, and usually wielding a knife. Whether history calls me an iconoclast, a visionary, or a madman, just know that I was razor-focused on a single artistic goal: Painting the shit out of sunflowers so that they’d look complet … | Continue reading
Posted on r/AmItheAsshole by u/medusas_bf Throwaway account because my girlfriend is on Reddit, and I don’t want her turning me into stone. I (24M) live with my girlfriend, Medusa (20F). We were friends growing up but had lost touch after she became a priestess for Athena (F). Ab … | Continue reading
Hello fellow citizens, Given recent tensions regarding our police department, we have taken your words to heart and have begun to make internal changes to take this first major step forward. The issue with modern policing is that there is no one out there making sure the police d … | Continue reading
Refugee Eye, a new gallery devoted to art by refugees, has opened in our building at 849 Valencia Street in San Francisco. The first show features photography by Jehad al-Saftawi. The gallery is the brainchild of al-Saftawi and his partner, Lara Aburamadan, asylum seekers who arr … | Continue reading
“The Academy Awards briefly came to a stunning halt Sunday night when Chris Rock made a joke about Jada Pinkett Smith, after which Will Smith went to the stage and hit him in the face.” — Washington Post, 3/27/22 - - -I’m just gonna go ahead and say it—Will Smith stole my night. … | Continue reading
Welcome, everyone. We’re so excited to have you as part of the team for the filming of The Dark Shadow River. We… (Assistant whispers in ear.) Sorry, sorry. I’m being told the book series is actually called The Dark River’s Shadow. My apologies for… (Assistant whispers in ear.) ( … | Continue reading
“Virginia [Ginni] Thomas, a conservative activist married to Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, repeatedly pressed White House Chief of Staff Mark Meadows to pursue unrelenting efforts to overturn the 2020 presidential election in a series of urgent text exchanges in the crit … | Continue reading
It used to be people were grateful just to find a humidifier. Their throat was dry, or their kid was sick, so they went to a drug store or a hardware store and were thrilled to find any old model. They didn’t care that Honeywells leaked or that Vickses were weirdly small. These p … | Continue reading
“Judging a Judge on Race and Crime, G.O.P. Plays to Base and Fringe.” — New York Times, 3/22/22 - - -This judiciary committee hearing is serious business, and as it progresses, I have one clear goal: to stir up frenzied moral panic among people who believe that Tom Hanks and Chri … | Continue reading
From Eugenia Viti’s empowering, empathetic, and inclusive new book for pregnancy Be Pregnant: An Illustrated Companion for Moms-to-Be comes this chart of the clichés pregnant people often hear, with helpful explanations and suggestions for possible responses. - - - | Continue reading
Welcome to Fairview Plaza Co-Op. We pride ourselves on fostering a vibrant community of young professionals, families, and retirees. We are looking forward to getting to know you not just as a tenant, but as a person. 1. Please provide copies of your driver’s license, social secu … | Continue reading
Employees: Now that we are all finally starting to return to the office, I just thought it would be helpful to remind everyone of the rules we have in place for keeping food in our shared refrigerator. Please follow these guidelines to help ensure the fridge remains a sanitary an … | Continue reading
OBJECTIVE/STANDARDS: Empathy, nonnormative cisgenderism, white shame, heterosexual ostracization, and liberal critical thinking. MATERIALS/RESOURCES: All That’s Wrong with the Bible by Jonah David Conner, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson, Why Ar … | Continue reading
“Call me Greg.” — Moby-Dick “Yep, that’s me… you’re probably wondering how I ended up in this situation…” — The Metamorphosis “Life is a highway, I wanna ride it all night long.” — On the Road “We slept in what had once been a Planet Fitness.” — The Handmaid’s Tale “They used to … | Continue reading
Good evening and welcome to Bedtime. I’ll be your guide for this interactive, multi-course experience. Have you been here before? Oh, hello. I didn’t recognize you with clean hair. And what are those? Pants with a button?! Wow, good for you. What’s that? It was Date Night, and yo … | Continue reading
“[Judge Jackson] did improv at Harvard.” — New York Magazine - - -Inside the Senate Judiciary Committee. Chairman Dick Durbin bangs his gavel. DICK DURBIN (D-IL): We now begin the confirmation hearing of Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson. Judge Jackson, your opening statement. KETANJI … | Continue reading
I wake up, head down to the kitchen, and pour myself a large bowl of AmazonBasics-brand Zorn Flakes. They’re not legally allowed to call them corn flakes anymore because they’re made with Amazon’s genetically modified corn substitute, Zorn, which is the only plant that still grow … | Continue reading
“Mother, I tire of the coding caterpillar.” The words send a chill up my spine, not just because of the outsized vocabulary that sounds, frankly, unsettling, coming out of the mouth of someone who doesn’t even have all of her teeth, but because I know what’s next: she wants more. … | Continue reading
May the standing desk rise to meet you. May the ergonomic pillow be at your back. May the fluorescent office lights shine warm upon your face, The consistent coughing from your coworker fall soft upon your ears, And until you’re able to work from home on Friday, May that guy lear … | Continue reading
It’s been well over a decade since Finnegans Wake raised eyebrows, and fans are naturally eager to find out what happens next. Here’s everything we know about Finnegans Wake II. If there’s one thing we can say about Finnegans Wake, it’s that the legendary doorstop left readers wi … | Continue reading
Art by Matt Smith - - -Holy shit, kid, that fuckin’ Harald Fairhair guy—now, that guy, he was a real fuckin’ fightah! Kicked evuhryone’s ass all up n’ down the coast in ohrdah tah be the fihrst fuckin’ king’ah all’ah Nahway since bein’ the king’ah all’ah Nahway was a real big dea … | Continue reading
9:34 a.m. Hey Team! It’s Courtney, your favorite office manager, here with a quick update about today’s brand-strategy meeting. In the latest twist of our work-from-home adventure, we’ve been having issues with our usual video conferencing software. So we’ll instead be hosting th … | Continue reading
“Yeahhh, torture motherfucker what?” I’ll fucken… I’ll fucken make special wipes 99.99% water-based so they don’t irritate the skin, charge $17.99 a pack then make it so every fucken wipe sticks together so when you pull one they all come out every single time but you just keep b … | Continue reading
I know nothing about owning a home, or any property for that matter, as I have always rented and, based on how things are looking, will likely rent for the rest of my life. Here’s what I assume owning a home is like: There is a lot of dust everywhere. You spend 60 to 70 percent o … | Continue reading
“Kansas, Tennessee, and Georgia are among those considering legislation like Florida’s House Bill 1557 … banning classroom discussion about gender identity and sexual orientation for specific ages.” — The National Desk - - -Don’t say straight! Children are too young to learn abou … | Continue reading
Read the first six installments of these plays here, here, here, here, here, here. - - -Tournament COWORKER: Are you doing the office March Madness pool? YOU: I don’t really follow college basketball. COWORKER: Only a ten-dollar buy in. Winner takes all. [Your COWORKER hands YOU … | Continue reading
What do we mean when we say a poet is great? When I use that adjective it has nothing to do with subject matter, with what the poet writes about—though it has much, surely, to do with a poet’s handling of the subjects they choose, or that choose them. It has little to do with the … | Continue reading
I get it. Things are scary right now. The environment is collapsing, democracy is eroding, and the worst pandemic in a century shows no signs of ending. It makes sense that you want a couple hours of escapism with the latest Batman movie—a brief respite when you can catch up with … | Continue reading
How to Reverse Declining History Major Enrollment Numbers, Which Are All the Faculty's Fault | Continue reading
“‘Black Panther’ director Ryan Coogler was briefly detained by police in Atlanta in January after he was mistaken for a bank robber at a Bank of America, according to a police report filed Wednesday.” — Variety, 3/9/22 - - -Given the misunderstanding between a Bank of America tel … | Continue reading
This is the second installment of our new serial comic by cartoonist Nguyên Khôi Nguyễn, chronicling his and his wife Thảo’s attempts to start a family. You can read Part 1 here. - - - | Continue reading
We currently have several openings at Such Good People, a nonprofit celebrating its quinceañera—a term we just love that we learned from our one La... | Continue reading
It’s probably too simple to say that those who forget the past are condemned to repeat it. Better, maybe, to say those who fail to imagine the past... | Continue reading
When you say, “Hello,” I say, “Ciao.”When you say, “Goodbye,” I say, “Ciao.”When you say nothing, I say “ciao” repeatedly to fill the awkward sil... | Continue reading
When Moby Dick bites the leg off Captain Ahab, woman, she goes to see the ship’s doctor. The doctor asks when the first day of her last period was ... | Continue reading
Are tea cozies clothes, and if so, do you not wear one on principle?Did you truly name your kid Chip ahead of time, or was he born while you were ... | Continue reading
“An armada of drivers calling themselves the ‘People’s Convoy’ circled the Beltway for more than four hours Sunday to protest pandemic restrictions... | Continue reading
Carl Phillips writes a poetry of fine distinctions. If he were a painter he would take one color—green, say—and show us all the shades and temperat... | Continue reading
There are many face shapes out there. Some are universally recognizable, others more exotic. But what they have in common is that they’re all wrong... | Continue reading
If trans kids are able to transition, that would mean that I would also need to transition. I would need muscles as big as Dwayne Johnson’s in orde... | Continue reading
Thanks for your interest in the Museum of Civilization. Our founder, Clark Thompson, established the Museum of Civilization in year zero, shortly a... | Continue reading
To Whom It May Concern:You know who I am. I’m Miranda Priestly, Editor-In-Chief of RUNWAY, the most popular and influential print magazine in the ... | Continue reading
In case you need help with the tune.- - -Come in on a Sunday? You’ve gotta be jokin’Christmas bonus was a car wash tokenStartin’ to think our sy... | Continue reading
A big part of my identity is eating trash chocolate. By trash chocolate, I mean highly processed, containing .02 percent cacao, and sold at gas sta... | Continue reading
“Very inconvenient class! Always holds lectures on top of mountains, in middle of the Sea of Galilee—but never close to the main campus.”“Inconsis... | Continue reading
“Texas officials have begun investigating parents of transgender adolescents for possible child abuse, according to a lawsuit filed on Tuesday, aft... | Continue reading
Chapter IX: Interloper in the Keep of the KingGerf felt a heavy weight on his shoulders.Perhaps it was just the dwarven wool cloak he wore. Or p... | Continue reading