My fellow Americans,Tonight I stand before you to say that the state of the union is good. Well, pretty good, or at least kind of solid. You know ... | Continue reading
“Bedtime Starts in the Morning: Nine Ways That Getting Plenty of Sunlight Before 9 A.M. Will Set You Up for Sleep Success Tonight”“No Caffeine, No... | Continue reading
We are an equal-opportunity employer that prides itself on being welcoming to all marginalized groups, including people with disabilities. We invit... | Continue reading
"Senator Tom Cotton refused four times on Sunday to condemn or even comment on Donald Trump’s repeated praise for Vladimir Putin, the Russian presi... | Continue reading
Dear Ms. Rako,When you announced that our presentation on Genghis Khan would be a group project, I knew that I would do all the work and my partne... | Continue reading
Imposter syndrome is real. In a competitive field like academia, everybody feels like a fraud sometimes, whether it’s a scathing peer review, a nas... | Continue reading
The US Department of Education (ED) will soon transfer the customer service of your federal loan account to Satan, a member of ED’s federal loan se... | Continue reading
When I logged onto Twitter this morning, I saw the New York Times’ story about Russia launching a full-scale invasion of Ukraine. Just below that s... | Continue reading
I’ll baptize your son in the pool behind the weights room.Bring your own floaties.Don’t worry about the lifeguard. I am the lifeguard. I work for... | Continue reading
Hey man, I thought I might find you here. I mean, you do come to this coffee shop every single day. What can I say, you’re a man of routine. There’... | Continue reading
This is the first installment of a new serial comic by cartoonist Nguyên Khôi Nguyễn, chronicling his and his wife Thảo’s attempts to start a famil... | Continue reading
“The claim that the Justices’ opinions are politically neutral is becoming increasingly hard to accept, especially from Thomas, whose wife, Virgin... | Continue reading
Dear Applicant:Thank you for applying to our advertising firm. Unfortunately, just as you were forewarned by your parents and teachers back in 201... | Continue reading
Music Man Stan, here, you may know me as the owner of the Neighborhood Music Shop in the Neighborhood of Make-Believe. But you know what? I’m a who... | Continue reading
William Henry Harrison served as the ninth president of the United States. He took the oath of office on March 4, 1841. On a cold, wet day, he refu... | Continue reading
Dear citizens, I know that I am not well. Amid this evening at Ford’s Theatre, my body has borne within it an abominable manifestation of political... | Continue reading
ChildhoodReal life: My mother stares at me as I try to pick up our dog by the hind legs and push her around the living room like a wheelbarrow. “D... | Continue reading
My hairnet is made out of two-hundred safety pins. My uniform has an underboob window and an overboob window. I am middle-aged (twenty-six) and wil... | Continue reading
Tequila Sunrise: Served before sunrise, with a handful of Tylenol, as you load urine-soaked sheets into the washer.Old Fashioned: Because it’s Sat... | Continue reading
A High School History Teacher Grades Article II of the United States Constitution | Continue reading
Well, it looks like we’ve reached a standoff, Pops. I know you think it’s time to head to the car so I can take a nap, but I’m not going anywhere u... | Continue reading
All right, settle down, everyone. Take your seats. This is Advanced Mathematical Social Dynamics and Applied Psychology in Literary Politics 361.L... | Continue reading
“Open Everything. The time to end pandemic restrictions is now.” — The Atlantic, 2/9/22- - -When the COVID-19 pandemic first struck, I was among ... | Continue reading
First AnniversaryTraditional: PaperModern: ClocksI Just Binged Yellowjackets: Non-pond water served in festive flutes made from leaves.Second A... | Continue reading
Happy Valentine’s Day! Just logging in for a quick scroll? Take your time.You’re not on here as much as you used to be. Still, we’ll never forget ... | Continue reading
Hey daddio, listen here. We know you’ve been itching to join our rough and tumble street gang, but I’ve got bad news, bucko: you just don’t got the... | Continue reading
I know it’s way past my bedtime, but I’m just poking my head in for a quick status update on my forty-seven valentines. No pressure, but if I don’t... | Continue reading
Knock, knock, son. Hope you’re not busy. Listen, your mother was cleaning your room and she found this notebook under your mattress. I promise, no ... | Continue reading
In every American city, long-time residents are being pushed out as wealthier newcomers fight for precious space. We need to stop the tidal wave of... | Continue reading
“To the surprise of perhaps no one, speculation about a season two for HBO Max’s buzzy ‘Sex and the City’ revival, ‘And Just Like That…’, has begun... | Continue reading
Ailing and isolating for the first weeks of the new year left my kitchen empty, so I decided to rejoin polite society in the aisles of Trader Joe’s... | Continue reading
This common but surprisingly dangerous creature dwells in billions of households worldwide. Your child may appear harmless, but it uses guile and s... | Continue reading
Do you love to write? Is writing what makes you feel alive? Are you sure?Let me ask you something: When’s the last time you wrote and thought, Tha... | Continue reading
Downstairs to DownstairsHOUSEHOLD SERVANT: I’m worried about Rich Lady.OTHER HOUSEHOLD SERVANT: Don’t be. She’s rich, ain’t she?HOUSEHOLD SERVAN... | Continue reading
The rules of commas are confusing, arcane, nonsensical, and require fifteen minutes of dedicated study. Who has the time? Fortunately, I’ll summari... | Continue reading
1. Self-publishing is easyI cannot impress this upon you enough: self-publishing is a ton of work. More than just writing a book, you’re also resp... | Continue reading
“Comedians did not sign up to be your hero. It’s our job to be irreverent and dangerous, to question authority and take you through a spooky mental... | Continue reading
Victoria Chang’s award-winning poetry collection The Boss is back in stock at last with a brand-new printing. To celebrate we’re rerunning both her... | Continue reading
Read the first five installments of these plays here, here, here, here, and here.- - -Time[Your cell phone buzzes at your makeshift workstation o... | Continue reading
Exciting new employment opportunity! Odyssey Cruise Lines is now staffing for a once-in-a-lifetime, ten-year expedition through the Aegean Sea. We’... | Continue reading
Take a look inside your refrigerator. How many half-empty sippy cups are in there right now? Don’t worry if the cups contain milk, chocolate milk, ... | Continue reading
6 a.m. Wake up and put on knit cardigan, slacks, and sensible shoes. Feed my cat, Mr. Foibles. Have tea and English muffin while I read Shakespeare... | Continue reading
Rhyme is not a lost art anymore, if it ever was, and Hannah Sullivan’s work shows, among other things, why that’s thrilling. Straight rhyme—song, g... | Continue reading
My fellow Romans, I write to warn you of a grave threat to the Roman economy and way of life. The progressives are at it again in their obsession w... | Continue reading
Your baby is beautiful. He’s going to be such a lady-killer. Of course, I don’t mean that this sweet baby you’re holding in your arms and trying to... | Continue reading
Carl Jung once said, “It is a frightening thought that man also has a shadow side to him, consisting not just of little weaknesses and foibles, but... | Continue reading
The CDC recognizes the specific challenge faced by mothers over the past two years in attempting to keep up with the frequent changes to our COVID-... | Continue reading
“Rep. Thomas Massie (R-Ky.) posted a quote from a neo-Nazi on Twitter on Sunday and incorrectly attributed it to Voltaire in an effort to attack Na... | Continue reading