“The Colorado attack is the 7th mass shooting in 7 days in the US.”— CNN, March 23, 2021- - -Everyone seems to be talking about all the car accid... | Continue reading
“’The Falcon and the Winter Soldier’ provides an answer on who’s paying the Avengers, and the answer is: no one… Basically, the superpowered people... | Continue reading
“The Ladies Who Lunch” (Company): You consider yourself to be “above” social media but are addicted to it nonetheless. You’re still incensed over h... | Continue reading
I say, gentlemen, are you seeing this crevasse? What an absolutely perfect specimen.Of course, I’d heard tell of such wonders from members of the ... | Continue reading
Well, it’s that time of year again, and we hope you can join us for our second annual Zoom Seder. That’s right: another Zoom Seder. You thought we ... | Continue reading
1. Taking off your half-zip sweater.2. Nodding vigorously as your teen explains cryptocurrency.3. Reaching through a car window to retrieve your ... | Continue reading
Hello, Mrs. Cherry’s 5th-grade class. I am Batman’s butler, Alfred Pennyworth. Welcome to the inaugural Batcave Tour for Gotham’s School Children. ... | Continue reading
Meg vs. BethKnown as the sizzling hot sister, Meg March specializes in getting good looks and her outside game is unstoppable. She moves well with... | Continue reading
“A Georgia sheriff’s commander was widely criticized Wednesday after he seemed to provide an excuse for the man arrested in the shooting deaths of ... | Continue reading
“The sports bill, passed by one [Missouri] House committee last week and awaiting a vote in another, proposes a constitutional amendment requiring ... | Continue reading
Female Asian Massage Parlor Workers Tragically Perish Due to Unwise Career ChoiceLocal Christian Carried Away in Righteous Crusade Against Houses ... | Continue reading
Jesus Christ, top of the morning man, I’m wiped. Thanks for picking me up. I don’t do this too often y’know, hitchhiking. People usually don’t stop... | Continue reading
“Senator Mitch McConnell on Tuesday bluntly warned Democrats who are considering weakening or eliminating the filibuster to push through progressiv... | Continue reading
Art by Matt Smith- - -Now thing is, back in those dahk medieval times, Ireland was a biggah fuckin’ shitshow ’en the Big fuckin’ Dig evah was n’ ... | Continue reading
IAmong eighteen black squares,the only moving thingwas my cursor.III was of thirty mindslike a laptopwith thirty tabs open.IIIA student’s ... | Continue reading
You can take your story arc and shove it, Madeline. You’re just a book agent who hasn’t had a sale in decades. You don’t even have an MFA. When I w... | Continue reading
Firefly Lane by Kristin HannahI’ve been pulling this one from the shelves a lot. I only have 11 seconds between loading up each item, but through... | Continue reading
“Watson!” bellowed Sherlock Holmes from the Chesterfield, handing me his laptop. “What do you make of this?” It was thrilling to hear the old excit... | Continue reading
Chekhov’s Gun states that a gun introduced in the first act must be fired by the last.Stephen King’s Gun: A gun introduced in the story must later... | Continue reading
Hey, everybody. I think I’ve seen a lot of you in several different cities. I usually look a little rough, and my THE END IS NEAR! sign has always ... | Continue reading
The following was discovered (it hardly bears mentioning) beneath a huge pile of unread manuscripts in a literary agent’s office. - - -We, the lit... | Continue reading
I don’t know when it started for me, but I have criticized my body for as long as I can remember. Maybe it was the way the girls at school used to ... | Continue reading
It’s hard being a package. Sometimes we’re out in the cold for a really long time. Sometimes someone puts a bomb in us. Sometimes someone thinks th... | Continue reading
Come, ye children, huddle close to my warmth — not closer than six feet, mind! There you are. It gives an old crone such as myself vast pleasures t... | Continue reading
Click table to enlarge. | Continue reading
Dear White Expat Men That I Have Met in China,Perhaps it is unfair of me to generalize. After all, not all of you are like this. I don’t want to m... | Continue reading
Ariel (The Little Mermaid)OPRAH: So when you struck the deal with Ursula to go to land, were you silent or were you silenced?ARIEL: … the latter... | Continue reading
“As I said last week, this is very simple, I never touched anyone inappropriately…no one ever told me at the time that I made them feel uncomfortab... | Continue reading
OPERATOR: Hello, what is your emergency, please?CALLER: Help! I live in a quiet English village where nothing ever happens.OPERATOR: What is your... | Continue reading
Congratulations, parents. I have come into your home as a birthday/Christmas/Daddy-hasn’t-been-around-in-a-while present. Consider it a blessing. I... | Continue reading
What he says: “I’ll call you.”What he means: “I’m going to text you. In a week. Maybe.”What he says: “Can we talk about this later?”What he mea... | Continue reading
Hey, I hate to be that guy. I really do. I hear what you’re saying, but I’m just going to have to play Devil’s Advocate here, because it’s movie ni... | Continue reading
I’ve been hearing a lot of buzz about raising the minimum wage, which hasn’t changed since 2009. I also haven’t changed since 2009, and why would I... | Continue reading
LEVEL 1: DOG WHISTLE OVERVIEWDUO THE OWL: Translate the following from Racist Dog Whistle to English:Voter ID laws are important to avoid voter... | Continue reading
ACT I, SCENE IEXT. THEBES TOWN CENTER. Evening. The gazebo at town center stands empty but for two cloaked young women, from a distance, perhaps ... | Continue reading
“White House press secretary Jen Psaki on Thursday defended President Biden calling the decision of two GOP governors to lift mask mandates as ‘Nea... | Continue reading
I am looking for someone — anyone —to purchase my biggest mistake, my most brutal nightmare, the godless creation of my worst impulses: my 4-bed, 3... | Continue reading
Are you stressed? Worn out? Astonished by the enormous number of mothers who have dropped out of the workforce in the last year since the Coronavir... | Continue reading
You’re an author with writer’s block, so your agent sends you to her villa in Tuscany for a month-long vacation to help you find your inspiration.... | Continue reading
Not sure how that happened. I did not think my personal stuff was connected to this. So strange. And just a note, this is not my main bank account.... | Continue reading
“Now 6 Dr. Seuss books are cancelled too? When history looks back at this time it will be held up as an example of a depraved sociopolitical purge ... | Continue reading
Casting Notice for the Next Great British Bake Off | Continue reading
Remember me? The girl who turned all your friends against you in seventh and eighth grade? The one who orchestrated daily loogie hockings to a chor... | Continue reading
Dear Applicant,Thank you for your interest in our graduate English program. We regret to inform you that your Imposter Syndrome was woefully misdi... | Continue reading
Miss Havisham-ingYou’ve been quarantining for twenty years and you’re experiencing major FOMO (Fear Of Marital Overtures). You take all the usual ... | Continue reading
What is Christopher CrossFit?Christopher CrossFit is an adult-oriented fitness program for men, women, and bodacious cowboys that focuses on stren... | Continue reading
All of the administrators at Northvale County Public Schools are committed to work-life balance for all of our teachers and staff during these tryi... | Continue reading
Team, it looks like there has been some concern lately regarding the company’s internal operations and the circumstances surrounding several recent... | Continue reading