Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Just wait till we have the heads up display that tells you which children are yours without you having to remember.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:A reader once told me that the only canonical feature of SMBC is that clowns are a distinct species.Today's News: Sorry. | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Sesame Street is to blame.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Panels 3 and 4 are the last 10 years of Internet summarized.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:No really, read it. This is her number one move.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I don't even trust MYSELF to catch my wife, even if I'm intending to.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Fact: Boethius wrote in modern English, with rhymes,Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I mean all of science works on the idea that you can't reallllly know anything but you can, like, pretty much know.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:This is the greatest Jakubinskij joke in the history of this medium. I believe the Eisners are taking nominations right now.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Dave Luebke once asked me why all the victims in my comic are Daves and now I'm starting to wonder if I have a problem.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:The real key to this trick is to add a steel plate under your own mattress just to show the kid that this is serious.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Wow, you have huge biceps from your constant muscle tension!Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I honestly don't understand why birders are all so happy. It's like constantly rubbing your face in human limitations, and then you don't even get to shoot the source of your suffering.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I just worry kids will never know the pleasure of convincing your exhausted mother that you'll shut up in exchange for the king size candy bar and 6 pounds of Ninja Turtles episodes.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I think we can run out the clock of we get a doomsaying AI going.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:The cool thing is we only have to do the Olympics once.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:First told to an 8-year-old who pretended not to laugh.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Now, you'll want to use the 500 paragraph format.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Note, this morning, when I have a lot of drawing to do, my stylus isn't working.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:You CAN get away with killing a million people if you make a million babies. It nets out.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I hate drawing crowds, but I love portraying humans as lemmings.Today's News: I know no reads this blog, but I just wanted to paste the shockingly positive reviews Bea Wolf has gotten so far. More are on the way, but are under wraps … | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Go forth and ruin a nice thing, friends.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Wake, work, wake, wink is the best sad story you can tell in 4 words that begin and end with the same sound.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:It's not a scam if it's just 50 trillion micro-scams!Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:The philosopher later refutes this while shouting FOUUUURRRR while thinking about butts. Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Actually you can express anything you want with a list of zeroes, so we're in zero dimensions.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I actually heard a woman with an Appalachian accent do this, but I was too nervous to ask for more information.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:The really awkward thing is there's only one apartment left on Earth and it's only got one bathroom.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Disclaimer: All legal advice from SMBC is excellent and foolproof.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:There's a really untapped vein of dad humor involving stud REMOVERS, given to your spouse shortly before you leave.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:This started off with me doing a joke about the Dostoyevsky quote, in which humans, knowing that all things are permitted, are depressed to find their behavior unchanged.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I want you to know I only read the headlines so I'm never distracted by understanding.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Really shouldn't have given every single chatbot access to the nuclear codes.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:When I was a kid, there was one superhero movie every 5 years and it was bad and we all felt ashamed and THAT'S THE WAY WE LIKED IT.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:We need to replace gender roles with chores. It's a win for everyone.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I feel there's an entire branch of mother-mocking founded in vast macroeconomic considerations.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Later, Batman disappears shortly after Bruce Wayne is discovered to have been running a cryptocurrency ponzi scheme.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Computer, please rewrite with more lies.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Thanks to patreon subscribers for correcting a scientific error in the original version of this ass joke.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:With no disrespect intended to you freaks.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:OMMMMMMYGODITHURTSSOMUCHToday's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:To be fair, it only REALLY starts to get bad once you have conscious, feeling life forms.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I had a note in my script to draw blood dripping out of their mouths, but then it turned out horrifying enough without it.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:I think the play makes a lot more sense if you imagine the ghost dad was making demands of lots of the characters in order to have the whole thing culminate in a pile of bodies.Today's News: Well looky here what came in the mail. | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Pronounced tzchphezche.Today's News: | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:A patreon subscriber points out that I've repeatedly done Daniel Dennett-related comics on Boxing Day, and that is the most wonderful coincidence I can image.Today's News: I continue to feel that everyone out to be freaking out more … | Continue reading
Click here to go see the bonus panel!Hovertext:Bonus panel works for all comics.Today's News: | Continue reading