Nothing will ever be like the family gatherings from when I was a kid. Nothing will ever be like it was, and I know this. But still, maybe there’s not supposed to be anything like this. Maybe this is what keeps our memories perfect and special. I know that times were different. I … | Continue reading
I have news for you, which should not come as a shock at all but, still, this needs to be placed here as a reminder. And this is really nothing more than a simple fact. Life will always keep moving. We know this. But more than saying, “Hey, that’s just life.”Right?“That’s how lif … | Continue reading
I turned 50 this year . . .It’s not been the coolest thing ever. I’ve had to face some new medical challenges. I’m on medication. I have to watch what I eat now.I have to take my blood pressure.I have to monitor my exercise and watch my stress levels, which is funny to me because … | Continue reading
The following is a personal service announcement. I know the usual catch phrase would be that this is a public service announcement. But this isn’t really public. No, this is certainly personal.This is a moment of awakening and more, this is a pledge between us. Just us. Just you … | Continue reading
And so it goes, right?The life we live, age, the things we do or say, and the people we meet and the things we love, the things that we see or the things we do are nothing more than elaborate patterns of time. And so it goes.The seconds become minutes and minutes become hours. An … | Continue reading
I will advise you now that in light of recent news, this one might be a bit tough to get through. I mean this both literally as well as personally. But at the same time, this might not be for everybody. At the same time, this is for everybody and anybody who questioned themselves … | Continue reading
It isn’t much though. At least, not really. All we are is a series of tiny moments that amass into this thing that we call life. I am offering this to you as a treaty of sorts. I want to place this here for you to hold in trust; that this way, you will know […] | Continue reading
Sure. I remember the first time I saw someone naked, live, and in person. I remember being a kid and seeing my first dirty magazine. At the same time, I’m not too sure where it began or if it ever began. I don’t know where the attraction came from, other than I know “it is” […] | Continue reading
I suppose what I miss the most are the things that no longer exist. And this is more than my youth. This is more than my ability to recover or to make it through a night without any sleep and somehow, I’d still be able to get to work the next day.But I miss more […] | Continue reading
There are people who we meet in life and albeit brief or if their stay in our existence is short or only temporary, no matter what happens to us afterwards or where our paths go off in different directions, these people will always be unforgettable to us. I can see them now. I ca … | Continue reading
The following is a thought that I cannot say is all mine. But more, this is a connection to something in my life. This is about a time and a place and at the same time, this is about a movie and my relation to a character. I know that my sentiments and my version of […] | Continue reading
This place is very special to me. it’s real and sturdy and while I understand this place has been there long before me and hopefully; this hill will be here long after me; there is something so delicate about this place to me – like an article from old newspaper that come from yo … | Continue reading
I have not always been sure what it means to be a man. At least, not really. Of course, I know what I used to think. I know about the more commercialized versions of what it means to be a man – or to be strong. And then again, I’m not so sure I know […] | Continue reading
Of course there will always be the memories of yesteryear. There will always be the memories from the times of our youth as well as the things we remember about the kids from the neighborhood. We will always remember the shows we watched on television. We will always remember our … | Continue reading
I am starting this here with a new journal. Memories from the balcony is a nothing more than a warm invitation. I will set aside the sadness and the hardships and share with you a few details of life. This journal is made to show nostalgia and the warmth of our memory. My aim is … | Continue reading
Maybe it’s a good time to end this here.Maybe the intentions of our lives are not something that will always match our best wishes, which again, there’s a saying for this which goes, “That’s life.”Isn’t it? I began this journal with the same intention that I began all of my journ … | Continue reading
I know that change is part of life. I know it. You know it. The people who look to hide from this or avoid it, they know it too. Everything changes. Our bodies change. Our opinions changes. Our intentions change and as we grow older, our options change too. Technology changes by … | Continue reading
Safe to say that I have lost. Safe to say that I have given myself to battles that were unworthy of my time. And yet, safe to say that I entangled myself in the unsuccessful battles of emotional warfare.Come to think of it . . .I used to say that I never pay attention when […] | Continue reading
Aside from knowing what I see, I don’t know what life is like through somebody else’s eyes. I don’t know what love is like to anyone else. I don’t know what it’s like to feel the sensation of touch through someone else’s skin. But I’d like to.I’d like to understand but, at the sa … | Continue reading
Sometimes the mind gets too full. And what I mean is there’s too much on your plate at one time. I suppose what I’m trying to say is that life is always happening. We have grown folks business and people who mistake out kindness for weakness. So yeah.Rest assured; life can be a c … | Continue reading
If I asked you a question, would you answer me?For example, if I asked you something like, if you could go back and say anything to anyone from your past, who would it be and what would you say?If you could go back to a person from your old life or from what might seem […] | Continue reading
It is true that we are who we are and that we are products of our background and environment. It is true to say that much of our hang-ups are linked back to early memories and carry on as a remnant from our childhood. I often discuss this because this is where my roots begin. […] | Continue reading
I admit it. I am not a fan of bullies. Then again, who is?I’m not a fan of anyone or anything that looks to punish or humiliate people, just to keep them down, or to keep them meek. And I see these people. I see them all the time. I see them and their insecurities […] | Continue reading
This entry does not belong to me so much as this belongs to the artists of the world and the musicians who have changed the way we see life. I can say this now as a disclaimer in order not to plagiarize any of someone else’s work. But more, I would like to offer this […] | Continue reading
There comes a time when you wake up enough to realize that everyone is human. Including our parents. Including our teachers. This includes authority figures from our youth. This includes everyone who told us our taught us something in our lives. This also suggests that not every … | Continue reading
It is a quiet morning here in purgatory. . .The streets are empty and the sun is beginning to do its trick. I am unclear whether the sky will be blue or somewhat gray because the clouds have not seemed to let go, at least not yet. There have been so many changes that are […] | Continue reading
My first journal was written in an attempt to save my own life. This is important for me to express because the action it took to create that journal was important to the details of my life, in which case, this is what’s brought me to this point. This is what’s brought me to the … | Continue reading
Before we go one step further, I would like the record to reflect that I come from a time that existed before filters. There were no cell phones or camera phones and at best, the smartest phone we had at the time was a cordless phone. Yes, I did have a rotary phone in my […] | Continue reading
I will say that there’s an art to the way we live. And to each their own, or it least, I think this is what people say. We all have our ways. We all have our own little quirks and personal fashion. I can say that yes, although we’re perfectly unique and individual; there’s a […] | Continue reading
The following is a bit of uncomfortable truths; however, in the efforts to answer the question, truth is exactly what this entry calls for. So, in the ideas of love or in the mention of what love is or if love is real; my answer is yes. Of course love is real. But where does […] | Continue reading
Maybe the goal is to defy your fears every day. Maybe fears alone are not so bad. Maybe this is just a case of the mind looking out for us.To keep us safe. . .And that’s fine.Maybe the fears of being hurt or being lost; or maybe the worries we have are only intended to […] | Continue reading
One thing’s for sure. We have to make this very real. And when I say “this,” I mean our plans for the future. Know what I mean?This means we have to plan ahead. We have to make our goals realistic and attainable; otherwise, we can lose sight of our reward system and then find our … | Continue reading
The on thing that I know about life is that everyone lives it. Everyone goes through something and essentially; the one thing I know about life is everybody is recovering from something. Everyone has a past and a secret. But more, everyone has had to face adversity of some kind. … | Continue reading
There is a saying that Moms always know best . . .Maybe this is true; however, I’m not sure if all moms know best. But I am sure that moms have ways of saying things that stay with us for a very long time.The world has certainly undergone some changes since Mom has been around. [ … | Continue reading
I was in a roomful of people with different credentials and letters after their name. Each person in the room had a position in a field that I was hoping to enter. Each person had school behind them. All of them had more than one degree. And then there was me. There was no title. … | Continue reading
And here we are again. (Aren’t we?)We’re on the verge of a decision. We’re on the verge of fear and dealing with the problems of what comes with indecision. We’re in the purgatory of emotions and thoughts. Here we are again, unsure, hopeful, wondering, wishing that something woul … | Continue reading
The truth is life is a journey. Along the way, we are going to find new discoveries. We are going to learn, change our mind and update our thinking. We are going to meet people and see new things. We are going to live each day being a new chance at a new life. This […] | Continue reading
Back on the farm, it was just before Christmas and all the members of the house gathered to watch a special movie. We were all together in the main room to watch a movie called Boys Town. To be clear, I was never into old movies or black and white films. At best, the only […] | Continue reading
My intention with this is simple. I want to normalize how common we are and that although we’re all different in our own way; life happens to everybody.I think now is a good time for a moment of truth.I think it would be best to say that since our thoughts are the direction of ou … | Continue reading
I used to listen when people would tell me about myself.I used to buy into this too. And after a while, I started to wonder why?Why am I allowing myself to submit to the predictions and the judgments of other people? I never questioned any of this. I just listened and accepted. I … | Continue reading
I have news for you.Moments will happen that come without warning. And sometimes, life has a way of throwing us off. Sometimes, people betray us. Sometimes, we say mean things. We can be hurtful at times. We can grow and we can fall. We can only take so much or so it seems and ju … | Continue reading
Ever hear a song that brings you back to a time when you were much younger. The world was a different place then. I was different and so were you, of course. I’m not sure what I knew or what I thought. Then again, I’m not sure if I was aware of anything. At the […] | Continue reading
In answer to the question, I will admit that this is a tough one for me to tackle. However, in answer to the question, I believe it is necessary to tell the world what I was thinking and that somehow, I was confused by an internal narrative that misled me to believe that somethin … | Continue reading
I will make this one quick and yes, indead, I think this might sound to be a bit sappy. But sappy or not; I will report this to you out of love and solidarity.Over the years, I have been fortunate to create new friendships. Some of these friendships are actually old connections f … | Continue reading
The following entry is an old journal entry. This is a rant of mine from back when I was working with an opiate overdose recovery team. I was angry at the time and a bit all-over-the-place. But this is an answer to some of the questions I get.Why did I choose to get involved with … | Continue reading
I love it when I see them on their first day. They are the young ones, the newbies. They’re fresh in the world and just starting out in the working world. I love the look in their eyes; partly intimidated, partly unsure of what to expect, and partly nervous, partly hopeful, part … | Continue reading
It is the first sunrise of a new year. The morning is unusually warm here in New York but the sky is pretty and the hour is quiet. I write this to you in a deep stage of thought. But more, I offer this with an honest version of myself, and to be truly introspective; […] | Continue reading
There is a story from my past which I am not too sure how the details go. However, for this entry I will do my best to be as true to the story as I can be. The story takes place in a typical suburban neighborhood on Long Island where a young man looked to […] | Continue reading