I suppose I wasn’t sure what to expect. This is the thought that came to me when it was early and my schedule had changed. My Sunday morning routine was altered by one special cause. Rather than wake up and journal before heading over to the homeless shelter, I had to make an hou … | Continue reading
In the case of me vs the world or wait, better yet, as it is in the case of most kids when faced with a letter that came home from school, or in answer to the main question which is the question I will be answering throughout this journal; oftentimes, there was an obvious answer … | Continue reading
Here’s a little introduction to a journal that will be based on the ever-popular question known as : What the hell were you thinking?The answers to this will range from “I don’t know” to, “It seemed like a good idea at the time.” Now, in all fairness; I am certainly not the first … | Continue reading
Before we go forward, this is not about religion.This might not be for everyone. However, this is written for those who find themselves “out there” and without any hope. This is a little piece about hope and salvation but not the typical kind. This is about redemption and forgive … | Continue reading
I will leave this here and let this be enough for now. I will leave this with you as my witness and say that yes, there are things I wish I could see again. There are times I wish I could relive and if it were possible, there are memories that I wish I could […] | Continue reading
I know that I mentioned a few things about a bus ride in my previous entries. One bus ride in particular was a trip back home when The Old Man was dying.I remember how cold it was yet the bus was warm. Maybe the bus was too warm but for the time being, it was […] | Continue reading
Today is a special day . . . It was 33 years ago when I stepped onto a bus out of Monticello, New York. I was young and scared. The ride was long and strange. It was Christmas Eve and the sky was gray. I chose to take a window seat on a mainly empty […] | Continue reading
Suddenly, I am on a trip and to put this simply, I am only a passenger. But wait, let me explain.There are choices to make, which train to go on? Do I take the train on left or right? Either way, both trains head to the same destination. Both trains depart at the same time […] | Continue reading
I want to take you now to an actual view of real life. This is not just my view or my life, but more, this is a view that will help translate and explain what it’s like to live with a certain mindset. Here. Take this. It’s an envelope. And inside are the contents of […] | Continue reading
I am sitting here with you now, alone, in the dark, and writing during the early hours of morning. This is before the day breaks and the sun sets sail. It is cold outside and winter is about to take its place on the main stage. I noticed the stars last night, which means that […] | Continue reading
There was a friend of mine who used to say, “I am as God made me.”This means, I am who I am. Or in his case, this means he is who he is.But this is me and in the version of myself, there are other parts of myself in which I say yes; this is […] | Continue reading
There was a morning, cold as ever in the month of November. I was only about nine years-old at the time and the hour was early. I remember this was a morning at football practice. I remember the frost on the ground and the cold mist was rising up from the icy grass. I remember [… … | Continue reading
I don’t know what you see. At least, not really. I talk about this often but the phenomenon of sight is not provably the same from one eye to another. I cannot say that I know for sure what the colors red or blue will look like to someone else. I can’t tell how yellow […] | Continue reading
I still think about this day, a Sunday morning, when I was back on the farm. I remember this because I had to go home for a day to see him. And by him, I mean The Old Man.I was taken home for a visit after learning that my Father had a heart attack. I […] | Continue reading
Today’s entry will be about a window that is more current in time. This window is me of course; however, this is a version of me that I have been trying to become for almost 50 years. And I say this because who I am now is relevant. I’m a man that’s lived on either […] | Continue reading
We take you now to a midnight view of what it means to be “awake: when the rest of the world is asleep and peaceful.And t all starts with just one thought. Then it’s two. The three. Next, you’re awake and you’re lying in bed, thinking about things which only serve to keep you up. … | Continue reading
Ever look at the clouds? Ever notice them and think about their formations? I figured that since we talked about the secrets of jigsaw puzzles, I might as well tell you about the clouds.I figured this would be a good time to give you a view from the beaches and explain a little m … | Continue reading
I suppose my reason for this journal is to give you a view of more than just a typical day in the life of another human being. This is me and yet, I am not the only one in this world who looks and thinks or feels and worries. I am not the only one […] | Continue reading
There is a little town about 26.8 miles east of the Midtown Tunnel which leads into New York City. The town is known as East Meadow. This was, is, and will always be my town. This is where I come from. This is where life happened. I grew up here. I learned here. I saw […] | Continue reading
In short, I’d like to show you something. Or better yet, I’d like to take you on a trip with me.Are you ready? Good, then let’s go.I want to be out there, far away, on that great ocean plateau of absolute nothingness. There’s no one around. There’s no one to interfere with the sk … | Continue reading
What we’re about to do is go back to a time that was influential to my early survival. I will not make any excuses or look to alter, minimize, or glorify any of this as to which; I want to be as clear when I report that none of this was cool. None of this […] | Continue reading
So, you freak out sometimes.Yeah. Me too It’s not crazy. Not at all. No, it’s just this thing that happens. It’s a thing that comes from inside, which is something that I have or maybe we have. Maybe everyone has it and in reality; we all freak out sometimes.Maybe, this is all ju … | Continue reading
There is a long standing argument that to someone who believes they have nothing, there is someone else who sees them as a person with everything. And yet, there is a person who has everything and to them, as if they have nothing. And so it goes this way sometimes. Life.Or is it … | Continue reading
This trip will be a little different today –This will take us around the world and back again, from youth to the present. To be clear, I think this trip was necessary for me. I think this will help us build some understanding between us about why we say things and why people lie. … | Continue reading
This one comes without apology and to be clear; I have had the great pleasure of working with and being in the presence of the greatest people in the world. And to them; what I am about to say will make senseThere are times when my emotions are high and times before I speak or [… … | Continue reading
I assume that like most people, I have places in my life that are more like special sanctuaries or places of reverence than anything else. These are places that lead me toward feelings of comfort or solace. I come here when I need comfort or a place to go think or find understand … | Continue reading
And so it goes, luckily number 13.I hope that you don’t mind me cutting like this but for now, I have some thoughts that are both important and time-sensitive. There will be no glances backwards in this entry. No, instead, I am keeping it here, between us.It’s just you and me.For … | Continue reading
I am about to take you to a view from a different time; and as I mention this, it is timely that I write this to you now in the early days of December. .I say this because I am reminded of a time when I was living on a farm at the age of […] | Continue reading
Before going forward, I want to say here and now, To hell With Doubt!And here’s why.The one thing I know without any mercy or hesitation is that doubt is contagious. And this is easy to catch too. It’s easy because doubt is plentiful; it’s everywhere you look and everywhere you t … | Continue reading
There are so many different versions of me, which took place at different times. Of course, there is the younger version of me. There is the scared version and the anxious version. There is the angry version of me and the unhealthy side too. Not to mention, there is a gentle side … | Continue reading
We are going to rewind for the moment. For now, we are going to go back to the importance of school and learning the basic relevance of socialization. And what I am about to say is nothing new, nor is this something that I and countless other people have said before. Same as it i … | Continue reading
We are going to fast forward for a moment and bring you up to a more current speed. This comes from a time of only a few years back. I am older now, of course. Fully grown as an adult with the same responsivities as anyone else. I pay taxes. I have a job – […] | Continue reading
We are moving now, you and me, through a time capsule of sorts and on our way, we are seeing different stations of my life that range from young childhood to the teen years. We can stop here for now at the confusing years, and troubles years and as we go, there is special notice … | Continue reading
I am about to take you on a different trip now with the eventual emphasis on the word “trip’ itself. But or now, let’s ease into the math of the crowd.For now, allow your mind to vision the politics of the crowd and the features of varying popularity. Think of the cool kids – or … | Continue reading
I want to start by saying how much I appreciate you taking these trips with me. And if you don’t mind, I hope you’ll follow me a little bit more into the next phase.I hope you don’t mind me bringing you around like this. However, the more that I write to you, the more it […] | Continue reading
A time comes when our age comes to mind. We look back with regards to the moments of our youth. Introspectively, we think about the good times and sift through the warm fragments of great nostalgia. We think back to the beginnings of our whereabouts and the times we had or the pl … | Continue reading
[The following require a bit of vision and imagination and therefore; this can be read and related to at anytime. However, today, since this is time sensitive, I will keep this in the now and extend this invitation to you, wholeheartedly and wholesomely tp received and welcomed a … | Continue reading
That’s my house over there. It’s white with an attached garage. My room is the room upstairs with the window that faces the front of the house. Ours is the fifth house, north of Front Street. The name of my street is Merrick Avenue which is somewhat of a main road but it’s not to … | Continue reading
They say that the eyes are the windows of the soul. And in my moments of early purification; this was my view. This was my family and like you or anyone else in the world, we come across our early visions to people who are the family’s royalty. Like, Grandparents. Like Grandmothe … | Continue reading
So, this is me.I am the young one, right there, on the right side of the dinner table. I was precocious, or so I was told. I am the youngest in this scenario and over to my right is my Mother. There she is, typical in many ways but unique in others. Then again, this […] | Continue reading
Tell me something good.Tell me something beautiful about the world like, say, the way the beach looks in the morning. Know what I mean?Tell me what the beach looks like, just about the time when the sun is coming up and all you can hear are the seagulls in the wind and the waves … | Continue reading
And then the alarm goes ring . . .It’s time to get up. The sun is about to push into the sky like a bright orange yolk in the palm of the horizon. It’s cold though. There will be no warmth today. At least, not from the sun. There will be a cool wind from […] | Continue reading
It is safe to say that I have met some unkind people. It is safe to say that we see this all the time too. We definitely see this on the 5 o’clock news. We see this at work too. We see people who lead through intimidation or people who speak with sarcasm.We see people […] | Continue reading
Daylight switches to dusk and night becomes the morning.I’ve written this before and yet; it’s as though I’ve never said this out loud.Before we know it, days have gone by (sometimes weeks or even months and then it’s years) and there we are, standing there with our questions and … | Continue reading
I know that we’ve all grown. And hell, it’s been years since we’ve been young or on the prowl and though we are not so young anymore, there is still a piece of us who has yet to grow. There is a part of our spirit which has yet to fully transition into the person […] | Continue reading
Just wondering . . .How old were you when you realized how important it is to enjoy your life? And, it’s a simple question really. So, when was it?When was it that you came to the understanding that your happiness is important? Or even better, has this happened yet? Has it happen … | Continue reading
I make no mistake when I say there will always be some kind of adversity. There will always be someone who comes along or someone to tell you about what you’ve done wrong or how and where you can improve. There will always be someone resting in the comforts of an armchair or behi … | Continue reading
The truth is that at the end of the day, there is only one face looking at you in your reflection. This is you; all day, every day. You are the start and finish and as I’ve always said, you are always the square root to your own equation. No one else is and to […] | Continue reading