It feels weird and cold where my mask used to be. Is this normal?It’s normal to feel uncomfortable without a mask in public after wearing one for ... | Continue reading
It feels weird and cold where my mask used to be. Is this normal?It’s normal to feel uncomfortable without a mask in public after wearing one for ... | Continue reading
Everyone! This coming weekend, there’s going to be a big gathering of people! The big gathering of people will be in a neighborhood! This will be t... | Continue reading
“Amy Cooper, a white woman who last year became a symbol of the routine racism that Black people face in their daily lives, is suing her former emp... | Continue reading
NAME: Whitman, WalterPhysician Notes: Goes by “Walt.”ADDRESS: The GrassNotes: Is this a housing development? Clarify with patient.AGE:I, no... | Continue reading
Bedtime TeaFrom our family to yours, enjoy our perfectly crafted bedtime tea made with soothing chamomile and a touch of relaxing lavender.Bedtim... | Continue reading
Thank you for your patience as we continue with our telehealth platform for all non-urgent doctor appointments. Be sure to follow the directions be... | Continue reading
With the Friends reunion out on HBO Max, there’s never been a better time to talk about the most under-examined element of the hit sitcom: the icon... | Continue reading
“The United States reached a new milestone in the fight against COVID-19 on Tuesday: 50 percent of adults are now fully vaccinated against the viru... | Continue reading
1. Just relax!2. Go on a vacation.3. Have you tried charting your cycle?4. Offer a libation to the goddess of vegetation.5. Get drunk. I can’t ... | Continue reading
It hath come to my attention that you 21st-century humans are slowly emerging from the “COVID-19 pandemic.” I too survived a great pestilence durin... | Continue reading
“Republican lawmakers have recently downplayed or outright denied the violence of the January 6 insurrection as a bipartisan agreement to investiga... | Continue reading
Freedom is not a given. We’re always one generation away from accepting the unthinkable.Forcing me, a good vaccine, to inject myself into the life... | Continue reading
“The Texas Senate voted along party lines to limit how public school teachers handle discussions of race and racism in the classroom. House Bill 39... | Continue reading
SCHOOL DISTRICT: As this school year comes to a close, we would like to thank you for all the hard work you put in over the course of this truly un... | Continue reading
Die 6Hard SevenDH8The Die and the HardRain, Rain, Go Away, Die Hard Again Another DayDie Hard in HellAll McClanes Go to HeavenJohn McClaneH... | Continue reading
“Tangled Up in Goo”Early one morning the sun was shiningI was laying in dreadWondering if she’d changed at allIf she still was undeadHer folks... | Continue reading
Hotfix 3.1.0 promises upgrades, maintenance, and an overall improved experience with the Boyfriend in your life. The dev team here at Your 20s™ is ... | Continue reading
Because You Enjoyed- Because you enjoyed Getting Your Kids into Winter Clothes, you might also enjoy Applying Sunscreen to Your Kids- Because you... | Continue reading
Yes, you there with the inquisitive look. I have performance issues, you see. One that requires undivided attention from random strangers walking b... | Continue reading
Emerson Whitney’s Heaven was recently named a finalist for the Believer Book Awards. In celebration of this and Heaven’s one-year anniversary, we c... | Continue reading
- - -I used to watch Mom on TV, would pull the videos out of the back of the cupboard while I was home sick as a teenager, they were in green VHS ... | Continue reading
First off, congratulations on your decision to put an offer in on your dream house. With record-low interest rates and the ability to work from hom... | Continue reading
“We were taught from day one to respect the game, respect the competition, respect the opponent… You don’t swing 3-0 when you’re up by that big a l... | Continue reading
Dear Sleep,We’ve been together for a while now, and I am tired of doing all the heavy lifting in our relationship. I feel like you’ve been phoning... | Continue reading
“If you are close to 40 years old, you are no longer a kid. Now the buzzword is ‘geriatric millennial.’ This definition, which has sparked controve... | Continue reading
1. The original working title of So was Jo as Peter Gabriel intended to make an album devoted to Facts of Life’s Jo Polniaczek.2. Peter wanted t... | Continue reading
It’s a tale as old as time. Democrats propose some pie-in-the-sky bill that involves a ton of government spending, and then, when you ask them how ... | Continue reading
Beaver of Fine Arts: This Week's Pop Quiz: Your Enne-dam Personality Type | Continue reading
Jen, I am so sorry. It has been too long since we’ve gotten to catch up! I’ve been dropping the ball as a friend lately. But I guess that’s just wh... | Continue reading
“The Supreme Court said on Monday it will hear a challenge to a Mississippi law barring almost all abortions after 15 weeks of pregnancy, setting u... | Continue reading
Maybe this work Zoom call isn’t the time for what I’m about to do here, but our boss Kevin has shared his screen to display a prompt that literally... | Continue reading
Hey little girl. Pardon. Young lady? Hello, young lady. Is your daddy home? I mean, your father? I mean, is there an adult home?Or are you, in fa... | Continue reading
Shouted “5! 6! 7! 8!” in the grocery store, just to see if anyone would break into a little soft-shoe.Made the other five members of my household ... | Continue reading
Let’s face it: streaming is broken. Content constantly disappears from your favorite platforms, new services pop up every day, and each streamer co... | Continue reading
It’s not that I don’t care about you. It’s just that I’m really busy writing my thesis. Also, if you were to come to me crying, I would perceive yo... | Continue reading
(Mobile readers: rotate screen to landscape for better view of charts.)- - -“Over a third of consumers (36%) say their consumption of cheese has i... | Continue reading
Hi guys. LOVING the poem here in Analytics and sorry for the delay on the review. Just a couple of suggestions to amp up engagement and SEO. As you... | Continue reading
Model in a baseball cap: Chic, easy-breezy, sporty yet feminine.Me in a baseball cap: Garth from Wayne’s World.- - -Model in overalls: Sun-dapple... | Continue reading
StrangersMOM: So if a strange man says I asked him to pick you up after school, what do you do, Henry?TODDLER: Ask him what my name is. If he get... | Continue reading
Wings are my vice. I love ripping meat off the bone with my teeth. Is there a poem yet about the refreshing feeling of wet naps after wing night? T... | Continue reading
Welcome to Tortured Artists, a writing residency where you’ll be forced to endure the profession you claim to love for more than 30 minutes at a ti... | Continue reading
Illustration by Arne Bellstorf.- - -This piece originally appeared in McSweeney’s 63. To read more from this issue, subscribe by July 15. - - -T... | Continue reading
It has arrived, oh feeble ones, the time for my automobile to barrel through your vicinity and announce my prowess—my vital and irrefutable masculi... | Continue reading
Philadelphia is her government name. You can call her “Philly,” if you’re family.Philly knows how to say water. Don’t tell her how to use her u’s... | Continue reading