I suppose this one is not for everybody.Then again, that’s’ the thing about artor maybe this is more about me, or subjectively,I suppose this is how it goes with the written wordand when it comes to the wordanything and everything can be relative and to me, or to someI have come … | Continue reading
There was a time, which I recall, long ago, when the summer came and we were young and the fireworks took over the sky. I talk about this often when the nostalgia kicks up.I think about the innocence of youth or the feel of say, dipping your toes in a pool of cold water, or […] | Continue reading
1) This is not just about hope. This is about beliefBut moreThis is about those who push usor support usand this about the difference betweenthose who lead us to believeand those who lead us to doubt. I used to hope for a chanceor a shotor I’d look for an open windowor some kind … | Continue reading
Is there any hope in pain?Or is pain part of hope?And perhaps both are trueor interchangeableand perhaps pain is part of learningor understandingand perhaps pain in part of our awakeningto which, we wake upand we learn that we have to change,or if nothing else,we have to go about … | Continue reading
I can say this is an ode to thosewho put me downor to those who told medon’t even think about itor that as hard as I tryI’d be fortunate to be averageor to be anything special;I’d be lucky becauseeither I was not from their clubor tribeor that someone who lookslike “me” or speaks … | Continue reading
And so goes the delusions of youthor the delusions of grandeurand so goes the world as we knewor the way that we saw it when, say,we thought that everythingcould be answered by a long night outwith friends . . .or like it was during the summer nightsdown by the water—out until th … | Continue reading
There is only one youthand yes, life has a wayof changing and redirecting usor better yet,life has a way of correcting usand teaching us different steps. Life has a way of changing the way we think or speak,and then, somehow,we come full circleor we revert to who we wereor where … | Continue reading
What inspires hope?Is it life?Is it someone or something,that creates or acts like a seed,and then triggers a thought . . .or is it a connectionwhich somehow,changes us for either the betteror worse? Is the inspiration of hopesomething that brings a sparkor starts the fire inside … | Continue reading
It is my intention to accentuate the benefitsof hope, or if not,and if for no other reason,my intention with this journal,or these posts are to illustrateone simple thing—There is no hope in hopelessness,and there is no peace in resentment. I know this all too well. There is no l … | Continue reading
How do you win?Or better yet, how do you stick it out,or stick through the rough spots,or hold on through the humblenessof falling down, or being knocked downor beaten and dragged to the rightor left; and essentially,how does one find the enduranceor the drive to continueand to p … | Continue reading
There are times when you are going to ask yourself, what the hell was I thinking?I swear this happens to everybody. There are times when we look back at our so-called hard times or the troubles from our past, and then we’ll shake our headsor we’ll laugh and realize that maybe it … | Continue reading
1) And the times that we count on are mounting, and the minutes we plan for are quick. And the days that we hoped for are fleeting, but the good memories we can buildnever fade. And I find myself, here in the doorway, looking outwards at the sunrise, while the days behind me have … | Continue reading
I’m starting to wonder about something. And to be closer to the point, or more specifically, I am starting to wonder if my level of hope has anything to do with the levelor the relationship I havewith my self-esteem. I say this because I think that there’s a change in need when i … | Continue reading
And somehow, or out of nowhere, it became June and the months seemed to peel away like a picture showor some flickering tale of 365 pictures that tell a story of what was, what happened, and what will never be again. Sometimes we see this and think,“what a waste”and maybe it was, … | Continue reading
We are up and running to find our way and with hopes to make up some time, and hopefully, we can get aheador find some way to make senseof this whole crazy place. It is morning now, and the rain has fallen. They say the sun is coming out from and that the day will […] | Continue reading
When the light comes in and the day breaks after a long night, there is this entire justification of being wild enough to dance in the City and to enjoy the pleasant mayhems of being young and crazy. This was us,once . . . Ah, I miss the aftermaths of long nights and the sunrise … | Continue reading
In a way, I think the reasons that we stand or fall are all somehow predetermined when it comes to this thing,which we call fate. I think that is a necessary walk that we take and the dead-ends or the defining moments, and the eye-opening events, which happenare all moments of no … | Continue reading
I have to say . . .I agree with something that I just read. And I have read things like this in different forms or formats, but ah, the truth is the truth, regardless of whether we like it, or agree;either way, life is life, truth is truth, the sky is always going to be […] | Continue reading
I think of the feeling that comes when you realize that enough is enough and finally, you find the courage it takes to stand up and walk away. I think about the brilliance and the resilience and the victory that comes when you finally decide to push yourself away and without a wo … | Continue reading
I told you this yesterdayand I’ll say this again,here and now.Hope is not the absence of hopelessnessand life is not always the most hopeful place. So, before we go forward,I think it pays to be honestand to allow for a moment of truthI think I’ll leave this herebefore trying to … | Continue reading
This is the book of hopeSo then?What does hope mean?What does it mean to have hope? Perhaps I should explainwhat this means to me;in basic terms. Hope— is this the film within our mindwhich we playover and over again?Or the or does this mean something else? I see hope as that thi … | Continue reading
1 And I hope . . .I hope that the winds will blow warmly, and the sun will shine brightly upon your face. I hope that the day will be kind and that the time will move easily, but not too quickly that we can’t take the time to soak up the memories and make […] | Continue reading
I watched a movie last night,which is not a new movie to menor is the movie new at alland to be clear,the name or the topic of this movieis not importantat least not more importantthan the message behind my postingnor is the acting or the actors themselvesas important as the mess … | Continue reading
I want to go back . . .I want to think about the way summer is about to explode and the first weekend of the unofficial start of the season takes place and life was still young enough to be wild Life was free enough and crazy enough to be out somewhere,as in, out east […] | Continue reading
It is coming to the timewhen sunlight is visible at an earlier hour. The sunrise is a pretty thing to see in the morning.And I know that life is still happening. I know that times can be hard and there are ideas and thoughts and feelings, which are less than easy to deal with. I … | Continue reading
There are times when we find ourselveson colder than usual morningsand the summer is supposedly on its way. But where’s the sun? And there are times when we findourselves in front of the windowand watching the rain as it drizzles,because plans changedwhen the sky became gray,and … | Continue reading
This one . . . , , , this one right herecomes from the deepest place in my heartand as for you,this one is for you,and me too. I go back to a morning after a long night, which took place at a time when everything in my life was in the midst of a […] | Continue reading
You have to laugh.You have to laugh, like, as if this is your main priority because like a muscle that is not used, or like a sun that is not seen, you can lose sight of its beautyor lose your sense of humor,or like an atrophy, you can lose strength or dexterity, or worse, you [… … | Continue reading
There is something about your smile, Intoxicating, yes, Of course I agree. But more, there is something mesmerizing, or maybe revitalizing is a better word, or even reassuring is a word that make sense to me because after all, what’s in a smile?The answer:More than you know But p … | Continue reading
Yes,I want to walk and run and breathe in the airand play or live in the moment.Wait, no.I want to live for the momentand be about this,instead of simply“talking” about it. “Let’s just do it!”Right? Okay then,here’s what I’d like I want the morning to be like that first day we ha … | Continue reading
I know that the world is a good place.And I know that life could be better.I know that not all things work out the way we’d like them to.But I also know that deep down, somehow, there has to be a reason and there has to some kind of passionor purpose for all that’s gone […] | Continue reading
I remember him now with the wind in his hair, the sun was high, like it is on a mid-August day, and the winds were warm, or warm as ever because of the warmth in my heart. The sky was clear, and I was nothing more than a little boy, wading in the waterand knee-deep […] | Continue reading
There is nothing like a Mother’s loveThere is nothing as strong or as ongoing, or unconditional, or so it should be, at least in the right life or during the right circumstancesof course. Mother, as in all directing, as in always connecting, always thinking and always looking to … | Continue reading
I have seen the sun come through the cloudswhen the sky is otherwise rainyand yes, I have seen light shine where otherwise there would be no other way to see light or to witness the shine. And yes, I have been to bad places or seen darker times and even still, somehow, I have fou … | Continue reading
It is raining in NYCBut, I don’t mind.Not at all. I don’t mind the rain.I think it’s a good thing.I think it’s good that the rain comesAt least to, me. I think the rain softens the dustwhich complicate the daysand somehow, the rain comesand there is a hushto the world, like a lul … | Continue reading
I know that it’s easy to see . . . .It’s easy to see all of the things that can go wrong. It’s easier to find the problems,and often, it’s easier to note the problemsthan it is to find the solutions, and man . . .sometimes, it’s hard to see the sun because the clouds […] | Continue reading
Maybe the focus shouldn’t be on Chaos anymore.Maybe the focus should be on something else,or something newlike the first light of morning, or when the sky starts to change, and dawn begins to break;the birds are chirpingand the world is sleepy and quiet. I love these momentsbecau … | Continue reading
Now, here’s the reason, or perhaps I should saythis is another motivationbehind this journal. The mind is the real trick. This is how we lose to the different concepts of thought; in which case, we can literally think ourselves out of the best scenarios, at least I think so.And t … | Continue reading
Nothing comes the way they used to. And this is not to say about the way things are or how things have almost progressed into some mindless way, or how people seem to overlap or intersect, and yet; no one takes the time to noticeor to look up from their cell phoneand no one takes … | Continue reading
I have a question,which is plain and simple, really.it is direct as direct can beand although the answers might notbe as obviousor as easy;the question is really simple. How does this work?I think that this is a fair question.Don’t you?I think this question is fair to askand yes, … | Continue reading
I never had the chance to be young. You know?What I mean is,i missed out on things that are importantor part of youth because somehow,i was trickedor robbed in away that I believed in the inaccuracies and the varying conceptsof love,or the lack thereof. I never had a prom or the … | Continue reading
Ah the process of you,Overthinking,and the wonders you work.I have heard it said that the mindis a terrible thing to waste,to which I say, yes,I agree.It’s true. I also agree that time is a terrible thing to wasteand so is our misused energyor the passion we loseor the moments we … | Continue reading
Ah the self-inflicted dramaor the self-induced problems,which you’ve sworn off a hundred times, and still,you find yourself encountering the same thingsfor the same reasons and, of course,someone always comes alongto remind you about the definitionof insanity which is doing the s … | Continue reading
Do you want to know this part? Okay, fine. There is a sound that never goes away or noises that you never forget, like say the sound of handcuffs as they clasp around your wrist or the sound of a cell door as it rolls shut. Trust me.And trust that as crazy as this sounds,and […] | Continue reading
If you know, then you’ll know. And if you really know, then none of this will come as a shock or a surprise to you. But if you don’t know or if you won’t know then maybe you can’t know. Maybe this is impossible for you to grab the conceptof a life like thisBut maybe […] | Continue reading
Talk about chaos . . .there is none like the ones you seewhen swirling lightsflash aroundor sirens comeor you see someone you loveas they’re lifted into an ambulanceand taken away. There is no chaos in your heartor disorder like the confusion you feelwhen sitting in a waiting roo … | Continue reading
Anger . . .What better way to express chaosor what better way to self-destructor to explode or implodeor do be more defined;what better way is there to lose controlby trying to controlthe uncontrollable? And it’s blinding,you know?You do thingsthat you’d swear you’d never do,if y … | Continue reading
I admit this might be a bit much, but, to be clearthe title of this journalis called The Book of Chaosand so . . in fairness to the topic, yesI think that both love and lustand the interchangeablenessof the two can be enough to drive anyone crazy. And, so . . . Yes, sure.I am […] | Continue reading