No Thanks, Telly

[Once again, I say “Yuck”.]Recently, I was asked by friend-of-the-site Oliver Y. if I’d be willing to use a free TV that came with inescapable ads. My reply? “Not a chance in hell”. Since the earliest days of this site, I’ve bemoaned the relentless march of advertising into every … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

ChatGPT Is Also a Liar

[Don’t even get me started on “Chat GTP”.]Today in not understanding technology, a college professor (slash rodeo instructor (?)) used ChatGTP in a misguided effort to determine if students had cheated. When it falsely claimed they had, the professor marked the assignments as “in … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Where Is My Alarm?

With your feet in the bed and your head in the bed. | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

This Is Awful

[I’m definitely a little sorry.]We should’ve seen this coming. A body was discovered inside a walk-in freezer at an Arby’s restaurant in Louisiana on Thursday. After all, Arby’s has been telling us they have the meats.Link: https://www.kadn.com/news/body-found-in-freezer-at-arbys … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

I Support This

[She’s Nguyening!]In Portland, Oregon, Jenny Nguyen has opened a different kind of sports bar, one which only plays women’s sports on its TVs. In 2018, Nguyen and a group of friends wanted to watch the NCAA women’s basketball championship game. They went to a mostly empty sports … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

The USA Has Gone [Too Few] Days Without a Mass Shooting

[“Infinity” is the ideal answer, but I’d settle for just moving that number higher than single digits.] Following Tuesday’s post about gun violence in America, I made a donation to Everytown for Gun Safety. If you’re in favor of sanity when it comes to guns, you can donate too. I … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Everyone’s Favorite Marine Biologist

[You can look directly into the eye of the great fish. Or mammal. Whatever!] On Saturday, August 19, the Brooklyn Cyclones will be giving away an incredible bobblehead, based on a classic Seinfeld episode called “The Marine Biologist”. Gaze upon it and weep at its majesty: [Phot … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Yours in Pixels and Prose

[“From my keyboard to yours” seems good, but then doesn’t quite make sense.]I’ve frequently linked to Shaun Usher‘s Letters of Note, a wonderful online museum containing correspondence from famous folks and other delightful missives. Recently, Usher used ChatGPT to generate 500 s … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Something’s Just Got to Give

[The worst case scenario is approximately our current reality.] Today, a brutal one-two punch combination, via the Washington Post. First, we have a surreal ban on backpacks, which will do nothing to address the actual problem of unrelenting gun violence in America. Meanwhile, a … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

We Need the Seeds

[So many other buns are just bad.] Trader Joe’s is a different kind of grocery store. They stock only a tenth of the items a larger grocery store offers, and carry almost exclusively their own branded products. As a result, the company frequently discontinues products, providing … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

I Was a Victim of Bird Strike

[But seriously, what the fuck, goose?] Yesterday morning, I was hit by a goose. A mile and a half in to a seven mile run, a goose flew directly into me. Physically, I’m mostly fine, if a bit sore. I don’t appear to have any beak bruises, at least. But mentally? Man, I don’t know! … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Gala Crasher

[Something something Jay Roach?]Monday’s extremely fancy, invitation-only, $50,000-per-ticket Met Gala featured at least one uninvited guest.Link: https://people.com/style/met-gala-2023-cockroach-red-carpet-photos-video/ | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

OK, Post, Go Get a New Name

[Seriously, just pick something else. Anything else.] While reading my pal Cabel’s recent look at a wide assortment of snacks, I came upon the following: Ok Go! Cereals I only bought this because Post is in the middle of a lawsuit with — surprise! — the band Ok Go, and I thought … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Living Under a Rock

[She left her offerings, as if to the gods.]I can’t say I understand the mindset of Beatriz Flamini, who voluntarily lived underground in near-total isolation for 500 days, but I am certainly fascinated.Link: https://www.npr.org/2023/04/17/1170388759/500-days-cave-beatriz-flamini … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Blocked Crossings

[Perhaps trains shouldn’t be miles long.]In Hammond, Indiana, students are being forced to climb over and under stopped trains just to get to school. This ProPublica report is horrifying, and it seems clear that something needs to change before a child is killed.Link: https://www … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Send in the Space Squids

[Invaders! Possibly from space!]“Space Invaders” is one of the most iconic video games of all time. On the occasion of a new release (in a mini arcade cabinet format), its creator Tomohiro Nishikado has shared some fascinating trivia. The technological limitations of the day were … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Terrible Twitter Truncation

[I can think of many, many better ways to spend $1,000 a month.] Many years ago, I obtained verification for the Twitter account over at my day job. At the time, verification was free, and the blue checkmark reinforced the trustworthiness of our posts. Under Twitter’s incompetent … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

What A Waste

[Personally, I have an affinity for the High Life.]Recently, some monstrous customs agents in Belgium destroyed over two thousand Millers High Life. Why? Because the beverage’s slogan proclaims itself to be “The Champagne of Beers”. The move came after a trade association for the … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Let’s Not Eat Too Ethically

[Being eaten really is an ancestral nightmare]Botanist Stefano Mancuso studies what might be called the consciousness of plants. In a recent interview, he gave a forthright pair of answers that really cracked me up. As we learn more about the sophistication and sensitivity of pla … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Rediscovering a Lost Joke

[This is an excellent use of audio editing abilities.]31 years ago yesterday, an episode of “The Simpsons” called “The Otto Show” aired. It contained a joke about Homer having tinnitus after attending too many heavy metal concerts. Under that, however, was another joke which Ewzz … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

In Search of an Ancient Shrugger

[Shine on, you crazy Shrug Guy]Way back in 2009, I penned a paean to Wikipedia. At the time, I wrote that my love for the site was due in no small part to “the areas where its ridiculousness shines through”. That remains true. In fact, almost 14 years later, the site surely conta … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

The Hazelwood Photograph

[It sounds so official.]You really can’t just use random pictures, Netflix.Link: https://www.wfaa.com/article/news/local/netflix-hatchet-wielding-hitchhiker-documentary-lawsuit-photo-caleb-mcgillvary-kai/287-4749be7a-6790-4cbb-bc11-52da9fe1a35d | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

The Newly Overemployed

[This sounds exhausting.]Over at Vice, there’s a fascinating and rather horrifying article on folks using AI to help them work multiple jobs. Some, like Ben, were drawn into the overemployed community as a result of ChatGPT. Others who were already working multiple jobs have use … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Same Time Next Year?

[Forget the Masters; the Boston Marathon is the real tradition unlike any other.] Eliud Kipchoge is one of the greatest distance runners the world has ever known. Coming into Monday’s Boston Marathon, he had earned victories in 12 major marathons, and failed to win just twice. Th … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Apple Rankings

[Yelling about apples since 2016]Are you overwhelmed by the surplus of new apple varieties on the market today? Allow Apple Rankings to assist.Link: https://applerankings.com/rating-system/ | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Theft of Dimes

[OK, “dime and dash” is pretty good, CNN.]Getting away with stealing $200,000 sounds nice and all, but if you do it by stealing 2 million dimes, you’re left with some terribly inconvenient lucre. I’m enjoying picturing the thieves trying to scoop up dimes as they run off, as wel … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Fishing for Beers

They once caught a beer thiiiiis big! | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Please Scream Inside Your Heart

[I usually do.]I don’t know why I didn’t write about the following story back when it first appeared. I was aware of it, and it seems a perfect fit for OFT, yet somehow it never made it onto the site. Today, I rectify that mistake. In July of 2020, we were still near the beginnin … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Don’t Do Business With Inkjet Supply and Hostage Situations Incorporated

[How do they sleep at night?]I’ve been a devoted fan of the home laser printer for quite some time. My current printer is a Brother laser that I purchased over a decade ago. Though I couldn’t find any email receipt for my actual purchase, I did find confirmation of the warranty r … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

We the People Are People

[Corporations are not.]Corporations shouldn’t be people, my friends. Rep. Pramila Jayapal (D-Washington) has introduced a bill that would end corporate personhood with the goal of reversing Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission, the infamous Supreme Court decision that h … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Utah’s Improved State Flag

[Fewer flagrantly flawed flags, (por) favor]State flags, and indeed most non-country flags, are almost uniformly terrible. But thanks to a recent redesign in Utah, there’s one fewer terrible state flag in America. Though I find the new design has an excessive number of elements, … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

The World’s Biggest Ice Carousel

[I’d take a ride, but I’m not sure I’d stay for the entire thing.]What do you do if you find yourself bored in far-north Maine? If you’re a member of the Northern Maine Ice Busters (“Just a bunch of Northern Maine working class citizens trying to beat cabin fever in the winter mo … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Rubbing It In

[“Bell Labs, go away, I don’t need you.”]50 years ago this past Monday, one of the first cell phone calls was made by Marty Cooper: On 3 April 1973, Marty Cooper stood on a corner of Sixth Avenue in New York and took a phone book from his pocket. He then punched a number into a l … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Felony Fish Cheating

[Lying is also still legal, in general.]Last fall, two fisherman were caught putting weights in fish, in a ploy to increase the size of their haul and thus win a tournament. The ridiculous nature of the whole thing led to this story being covered pretty widely. There was actually … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

The World’s Lightest Paint

[It’s really light.]Thanks to an incredible new kind of “structural” paint, airplanes could soon fly a lot more efficiently. While it currently takes over 1,000 pounds of paint to cover a 747, it could soon may take as little as about 3 pounds. Changes to the weight of airplanes … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Twiter Is Dying

[$44 billion could probably buy all the wrecking balls in the world.]I don’t know if Twitter will ever go the way of Friendster, but its demise looks a lot more likely now than it did a year ago. At TechCrunch, Natasha Lomas has a good overview of what Twitter was, what it has be … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

He’s Tried Nothing and He’s All Out of Ideas

[Please note that Burchett’s children are home-schooled.]Rather than offering feckless “thoughts and prayers”, congressman Tim Burchett gave a more honest response to the recent school shooting in Nashville: “It’s a horrible, horrible situation,” Burchett told reporters. “And we’ … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

AI as a Constructor for Sol LeWitt

[AI’s results are improving at a rapid pace.]I’ve been a fan of Sol LeWitt’s work since not long after I first read this tremendous piece by Dan Cohen. In fact, I’ve made three different visits to the exhibit at MASS MoCA that Cohen discusses, and every time, I’ve been awed. If a … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

One Day, She’ll Be Free

[American’s mass incarceration has many unseen harms.]Columbia University student Angel Gilbert has written a piece that’s been stuck in my mind since I read it. It’s worth your time to read about her experiences as the daughter of an incarcerated mother.Link: https://slate.com/t … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

A Petard-Throwing Parent

[The Bible really is pretty pornographic.]The phrase “hoist with his own petard” comes from Shakespeare. Wikipedia described the literal meaning as “a bomb-maker is blown (“hoist”) off the ground by his own bomb (a “petard” is a small explosive device)”. Figuratively, it’s used t … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Click to Cancel

[The same methods must be available for both actions as well.]A new FTC proposal would require companies to make it possible to cancel memberships and subscriptions in the same number of steps as it takes to sign up. That’s downright sensible.Link: https://www.theverge.com/2023/3 … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

No Need to Book a Table for Dinner Yet

[What a relief!]When it comes to popular date nights, it’s wise to plan ahead. That said, you can perhaps hold off on scheduling a romantic night out for Valentine’s Day 2046. On that day, a recently discovered asteroid may crash into Earth.Link: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/aste … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

More Like a Troll Shark

[This is a little funny, but also a really lousy thing to do.]Did scientists get pranked by a photo of a plastic toy shark? It seems likely.Link: https://gizmodo.com/goblin-shark-photo-plastic-toy-drama-mediterranean-1850237339 | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

GPT-4 Is a Liar

[The only winning move is to not give an AI control of the nuclear arsenal.]A lot has been written about ChatGPT in recent months. The chatbot is one of the most popular ways of interacting with OpenAI’s GPT-3 and GPT-4 artificial intelligences, and it’s been the subject of many … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

She Is Risen!

[We’ve clearly got some sort of a Thingette situation.]Recently, a human hand was found in the woods of Staten Island. Thought that was surely disconcerting for the dog walker who noticed it, a subsequent search turned up nothing further. Eventually, police used fingerprint analy … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Enjoy When It’s Time to Connect and Chill Out

[Me, I miss Five Alive.]Sure, we’ve got OJ (and champagne), purple stuff, and (Jack and) soda. But why not go for Sunny D vodka seltzer? If the company fails to remake this ad with adults, their marketing team ought to be fired.Link: https://www.foodandwine.com/sunnyd-vodka-seltz … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

The Emails Bounced

[Perhaps having a PR team might be useful.]Apparently, Teslas aren’t as secure as one would hope. Recently, two drivers managed to get into and drive each other’s vehicles. That’s not great! Also not great? The failed attempts of Rajesh Randev, the driver who first took an incorr … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago

Meet Snitchbot

[It makes “a cosmic whirring sound”.]I’m very surprised to hear (via reader Colin W.) that those brutal bot-breaking bastards in Philadelphia are apparently just fine with security robots.Link: https://www.inquirer.com/news/philadelphia/lowes-knightscope-k5-autonomous-outdoor-sec … | Continue reading


@onefoottsunami.com | 1 year ago