Get comfortable with discomfort. If you can tolerate more discomfort than anyone else in the room, you’re the most powerful person there. If you can stay in the awkward pause a little longerIf you can hold the eye contactIf you can ask the unspoken questionIf you can give your ow … | Continue reading
One of the things I like most about reality, as far as I understand it, is how all the very big things are made of very very small things. And the closer we look at the very small things, the more we find. Even smaller, even tinier. We keep peering in further, looking for somethi … | Continue reading
Months ago a friend said, “Well, I don’t take anything I think very seriously.” This made me pause. Because I knew, immediately: I am the opposite. I take everything I think quite seriously. Well, okay, not everything. But warnings, alarms, and worries. Little mental flags waving … | Continue reading
If I were writing about my own small unknown complex life, I would talk about all of it. I wouldn’t tell every single detail. I wouldn’t share private things that need to stay private. But I would be real and detailed and generic and so very specific about my own life. All of it. … | Continue reading
Today, in news that should come as a shock to absolutely no one but will in more places than you might imagine produce fervent fevered reactions that create just enough feel-good juice in the moment to subvert much of the long-term momentum that might have been building: A wealth … | Continue reading
I don’t know. It’s weird, right? Sometimes you do a lot of writing, or coding or designing or crafting or reading or running or lifting or skiing or whatever it is you do. And you’re untouchable. You’re floating gliding flowing, jumping over hurdles, feeling like the queen of the … | Continue reading
Insecurity appears most often as the feeling that I’m back at ground zero, starting from nothing, again. Here I am again, here I am again, I should have learned, I should have learned by now. Insecurity means I’m overwhelmed and unprepared and everything is chaotic. Insecurity le … | Continue reading
So, we know things.Some things we know for sure. Absolute things. Those are the most dangerous things. I have known for certain quite a few things that turned out to be either 1) very much not certain or 2) very much not even close to true, let alone certainly true. What a shock! … | Continue reading
Once upon a time, several years ago, a friend and I were having a conversation. We had different viewpoints. Different is mild. Really, we had opposing viewpoints. If my view were accurate, hers would automatically be both factually and morally wrong. And the other way around. Ok … | Continue reading
The love I give doesn’t depend on the person I’m loving. It depends on me. Here’s how I know: I love everyone in my life the same way. I love the way I love because of who I am. I don’t know how to love people differently. I have one flavor of love, and that […] The post Love dep … | Continue reading
I grew up in Mississippi, mostly, where we have a lot of thick red clay. One summer we decided to dig a swimming pool. In our yard. Because why not? It was hot, it was humid, we had time and shovels and a water hose. We also had a freshly turned up section of yard, […] The post T … | Continue reading
God I love a mossy logAnd lichen on a tree, tiny frog shelf, dew-drop catcher.Damn I could walk this sun-dappled trail for hoursAnd forget everything elseForget all of it.Holy hell there’s a stream.A quaint little stream right here in the fucking forest, making tiny water noises … | Continue reading
The kids are okay. The kids are all right. Despite it all. Despite all my worries and all my fears. And I know I’m not in the end game. There are years of parenting ahead and each year is full of opportunities for things/kids to not be okay. But we’re okay right now and we’ll […] … | Continue reading
I’ve been an avid reader since I learned to read, which was early in my life. I like to read, and talk about books, and write about books, and recommend books. And I like to hear from other people about books. Lately I’ve been thinking about how much talking-about-reading is pack … | Continue reading
“People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that’s bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they’re afraid to f … | Continue reading
What we need for life is pretty simple. What we want, on the other hand, gets complex in a hurry. But maybe getting what we want is easier than we think. | Continue reading