Ahh, Spring! The air is crisp, the flowers are blooming, and the garden slugs are JUST peeking out from their hidey holes: ...in our cakes. Ew. Maybe we should go back to the flower thing. After all, flowers make everything prettier, from weddings: ...to anniversaries: ...to birt … | Continue reading
Hello, and welcome to your virtual color therapy session! As you know, it's national color therapy month, so the results we get here today will be invaluable to researchers everywhere who need a good laugh. Remember, this IS for posterity, so please, be honest. How do these color … | Continue reading
It's time for part 2 of fabulous new nicknames! Another 3-letter-name goes up in flames: (Aw, Hal.) Let's see if you can guess the rest without any help: "The 'N' is silent." Whether you're Stephen with a 'ph' or Steven with a 'v,' I've got you covered: It's pronounced "Stiv-FEN. … | Continue reading
My friends, I have an extra special gift for a bunch of you with common American names: the gift... of new nicknames. Bobbie knows what I'm talking 'bout, don't ya, hon'? Yes, yes she does. So let's get to it - and fingers crossed you find your name in here! This one works for Bo … | Continue reading
It's time for a Disney Movie Sweets Marathon! Let's kick it off with a few classics, shall we? (By CW reader Brittnee W., who's in culinary school!) Cinderella's helpers really did have great taste; her original pink dress just doesn't get enough love these days, which is why I e … | Continue reading
There's something about staring at wrecks for a while that makes me start thinking... Deep Thoughts. You know, stuff like: Is it true cannibals won't eat clowns because they taste funny? And why don't sheep shrink when it rains? Ever wonder what color Smurfs turn when they're cho … | Continue reading
YOU GUYS. I found it: the ultimate litmus test for a pure mind. Here's how it works: If you can look at the following cake without immediately side-eying the person next to you and/or laughing like a scandalized hyena, you pass. Ready? GO: Oh, and if you see the name "Emma," you … | Continue reading
Drat. I totally meant to do a post on Procrastination Week three weeks ago but I was, uh... really busy. [innocent whistling] So, anyway, I've been meaning to show you guys a post I've been working on, and now seems the best time to do it! Here goes... Father's Day is this week, … | Continue reading
You should know two things about today's wreck. No, three. Three things about today's wreck: 1) It's supposed to look like a tennis racket. 2) That word was supposed to be "ace." ACE. Ooopsie. 3) Looks like Jarman JUST GOT SERVED. Thanks to Sarah H. for intercepting today's wreck … | Continue reading
And they say cake decorating is dead: It's not dead. It's more in the process of being slowly bludgeoned to death. Ergo the massive head injury and general fuglitude happening here. Now let's take a rare glimpse at the Cake Wrecks Facebook Wall - because, oh yes, we're one of tho … | Continue reading
It's officially Spring!! Which, I know, doesn't mean much when you're still buried in snow or already rockin' the flip-flops. (GUILTY.) Still, Spring means flowers and happy colors, so today, that's what you get. And you're gonna like it. (By Suzanne Kleinsman, aka The Queen of P … | Continue reading
Spring has officially begun, minions, so forget the forecast, throw on some flip-flops, and break out the finger flowers! AW YEAH FINGER FLOWERS. (At least it beats a knuckle sandwich? Yes? No? Shall I show myself out?) Yep, there's nothing like Spring flowers, with all their bou … | Continue reading
Today's post is dedicated to the American Hero who added a bottle of Jack Daniel's to this display: Bless you, sir/madam. Bless you. Um... Please tell me I'm not the only one who immediately saw this: Just me? Bakers, I imagine parenthood is tough enough. You really shouldn't go … | Continue reading
Thanks to Geneva W., Amy C., & Anony M., for the Mm, I see, k, EEK WHY? ***** As a life-long fan of the Mouse, let me show you my favorite Mickey figurine: Enesco Mickey Mouse Vinyl Figure It's friggin' adorable (the bow tie!), bigger than you expect, and on sale at Amazon for le … | Continue reading
[WARNING: It's been far too long since I told you to hide the kids, right? Well, today's the day, peeps. No kids or bosses beyond this point, unless you enjoy awkward conversations. :D] You know those commercials where you can't figure out what they're trying to sell? Like, okay, … | Continue reading
Ahh, St. Paddy's day. A day of rainbows: A day of trash cans(?) filled with popcorn(??): And, of course, a day of traditional Irish padlocks: Which is where "St. Paddy's" comes from, of course. Make sure you never call it St. Patty's, though, lest you incur the wrath of both inte … | Continue reading
With St. Patrick's coming up this week, I thought we'd celebrate gorgeous shades of green: (By Dream Day Cakes) Yep, whether you're looking for some Irish wedding inspiration: (By Honey Crumb Cake Studio) Or you're just a sucker for all things emerald: (By Sweet Tiers) Have I got … | Continue reading
And now, our yearly tradition continues... [dimming lights] [queuing up sexy saxophone music] [adjusting Speedo] Hey, Bebeh. How YOU doin'? Today is Ken Day, bebeh doll, and that means I'm here to make all your sexy, sexy dreams come true. Except maybe that one. (Never again, Can … | Continue reading
Finally, minions - at long last! A candy cake wreck to rival the great Hershey Kiss-And-Yell debacle of 2013! Here, let me set this up for you. This is what Jill wanted for her friend Becky's retirement party: Only, you know, as a cake. It didn't even have to be shaped like the c … | Continue reading
Here are a few tips for making the "perfect" doll cake. - This is totally acceptable for a Groom's Cake: No, really. She's got panties on, so it's cool. - When making a doll dress cake, go for icing colors every little girl loves: Specifically, the colors of despair and gnawing e … | Continue reading
Heidi wanted a pizza cake, and so asked her local bakery to make one. The encounter went something like this: Heidi: "Hi, I'd like to order a pizza cake, please." Baker: "A pizza... cake?" Heidi: "Yes, you know, a cake that looks like a pizza." Baker: "I'm not following." Heidi: … | Continue reading
When CW reader Michelle ordered her 6-year-old daughter's birthday cake, she decided to stick with something classic: a rainbow. That's right, just a niiiice, simple rainbow, "with a cloud on either end." As it turned out, though, Michelle's baker MAY have been a little hard of h … | Continue reading
I scroll through hundreds of gorgeous cakes every week, and after 10+ years it can be tough to find 10 or 11 to fit a specific theme each Sunday. So this week, my only requirement? Wedding cakes that made me say "WOW." Starting with this sweet and airy Art Deco number: (Amanda Ea … | Continue reading
I feel like this could apply to a few of you: It's for your own safety, really. A cake a day keeps the road rage away! *** Bakers are forever amazing me with their new decorating techniques. For instance, did you know it's possible to pipe with semi-congealed Velveeta? I mean, no … | Continue reading
You know that song from Tangled that always makes you cry? This isn't that song. [Spotlight on a single, burly baker] It's delicious, creamy, dairy I use so much it's scary And design-wise, my cakes are not the neatest. But with lots of yummy gook There are flaws you'll overlook! … | Continue reading
Gents, are you feeling a bit... droopy... lately? Because whether you want to rock out with your turkey out: Do a little dribbling: Or just feel on fire again: The answer is as plain as the "nose" on Elmo's face! Even little Brandon here knows: There's more than one way to win th … | Continue reading
If you've been hanging around this blog for a while, then you probably remember the infamous Flash Drive wreck. That's the one where someone brought in a photo on a flash drive, but instead of using the photo, the bakery recreated the flash drive itself on the cake. It's one of t … | Continue reading
It's National "Write A Letter Of Appreciation" Week, so let's take a moment to address those who make all of this possible: the bakers. [cues sappy violin music] [turns to face camera] [looks very, very sincere] Thank you, Bakery Wreckerator, for making every chocolate swirl look … | Continue reading
This week I thought we'd look at cakes just like me: short, but sweet. :D Not only are today's Sweets all a single tier tall, they're also fantastic inspiration for us mere mortals. After all, most of us will never attempt a giant showstopper cake, but we MIGHT get ambitious with … | Continue reading
If you've ever ordered a kids' cake from a grocery store, odds are it was made with some kind of plastic accessory kit. Cake kits are the bakery's way of guaranteeing us that every cake we order from their picture book... ... will NOT look this good. Ever. If by some chance you a … | Continue reading
It's time to let sleeping dogs lie, to grab the bull by the horns, and to maybe leave the rest of the animals out of this, 'cuz now my cats are looking nervous. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. So clearly this baker hates you. When life gives you lemons: ...ask life, … | Continue reading
Brenna P. writes, "Since it was my husband’s birthday last week, I thought it would be a fun idea to get a birthday cake that would also reveal the gender of our baby due this summer." [nodding vigorously] Excellent, excellent. WHAT COULD GO WRONG WITH THIS PLAN. [making popcorn] … | Continue reading
Momma gave us this birthday tip Her face stern, her hand on her hip "When serving horse cake "With this kind of face "Well, sonny, don't give me no lip." *** Gumdrop was gloomy and tense Her flight was one filled with suspense With wings on one side No physics applied But whoever … | Continue reading
I won't tell you how long I thought this was a sideways H: I also won't tell you how long I stared at this one: ...before John finally pointed to the post-it. However, I *will* tell you John spent the same amount of time thinking this was a perfectly nice cake, and wondering why … | Continue reading
John's been on a baking kick lately, so I've just had strawberry cake for breakfast, minions. Not pancakes, mind you, or donuts or muffins are other socially acceptable morning desserts. I'm talking homemade-buttercream-slathered, jam-filled, multi-tiered CAKE. With strawberry ro … | Continue reading
Thanks to Lyndsay S., Heather M., LL, Gary B., & Heather for the photo finish. ***** P.S. If that's why we have Photoshop, then this is why we have punctuation: Punctuation Saves Lives :D ***** And from my other blog, Epbot: | Continue reading
I was an honorary cub scout around age 6, because A) my brother was an actual cub scout, B) our mom was troop leader, and C) we didn't have a babysitter. My only clear memory of that time was making salt dough pretzels with the boys, though, which tasted terrible. The pretzels, I … | Continue reading
(Yes, we're quite proud.) + = ***** + = ***** + = Thanks to Brooke A., Michelle L., & Millers for keepin' it surreal. ***** P.S. I learned some fascinating things today. First, that officially licensed Smurfs graphic novels exist, and second, that this is one that came out in 201 … | Continue reading
I figure the only way I'm going to get rid of this earworm is by giving it to you guys. So... Hit it! So, it's gonna be forever Or it's gonna go down in flames. You can tell me when it's over, If the high was worth the pain. Got a long list of ex-lovers! They'll tell you... I'm i … | Continue reading
Ever get the feeling something's missing? Like the second cake Jessie ordered? Or any semblance of reading comprehension? LEGO Batman is all the rage right now, so here: ...something to rage over. (Or maybe sh** a brick? I'll show myself out.) And finally, when you ask for "The C … | Continue reading
It's hard enough to make a gorgeous cake, but how about one that seems to float in mid-air? (By Vicky Angel Cake Design) What cakey voodoo is this?? Because I LIKE IT. Yep, these frosted feats of engineering never cease to amaze me, so today, it's ALL floating voodoo Sweets, guar … | Continue reading
It's not always easy to express your feelings on Valentine's Day. Fortunately, these Wreckerators are here to help. A-HAH! This explains all those "Marry Christmas" cakes! Happy Valentines + 'Day' Yep, that's a first. I'm continually amazed at how many Wreckerators botch the clas … | Continue reading
It's time for another one of our chats, bakers. You know, the ones where I give well-reasoned arguments for why you shouldn't wreck things, and you completely ignore me? You're like my cats, only armed with piping bags instead of hairballs. No, Professor Fluffypants, no! Still, a … | Continue reading
With all the scary C-section and jelly-soaked vagina cakes out there, I think we've lost track of what a baby shower cake SHOULD be. No, this isn't it. C'mon, guys, what's wrong with a sweet, heartfelt sentiment? Or a cutesy character? (On the plus side, it's nice seeing chocolat … | Continue reading
When you aim for a platitude, but end up at every cat-owner's reality: AIN'T IT THE TRUTH. Then there's this gem: I have nothing to add; that just cracked me up. (WHAT.) Let's see if you can guess this party's theme: (Oh how I wish those Ts were Ps...) Did you get it? Of course y … | Continue reading
Not feeling the love today? Then here, try these Valentines on for sighs. 'Cuz nothing says romance like necrotic tissue! Another sure-fire mood-killer? Faded pictures of screaming children on motorcycles: He's yelling, "EWW WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING??" Maybe you don't want to kill … | Continue reading
You guys! Happy Valentine's Week! So I think it's time to follow your heart... (By That Baking Girl) ...right over here to the dessert table. Because that's where all the giant cupcakes are: (By Andrea's Sweet Cakes) You know what my favorite thing about cupcakes is? Not having t … | Continue reading
Calling all "Qualified" Cake "Decorators"! Er... Sure, it's a tough job, but someone's gotta poo it. Though it does require you give a flying crap: And be a regular person: You know, no weirdos. If that's you, then this job could be yours in a pinch! A heaping pile o' fun! Just r … | Continue reading