I had a streak going. See, for the past two years I narrowly avoided getting sick. Have you ever made it through a winter or two with that kind of luck? It was my first time and let me just say there’s nothing like a little run of good health to make you feel invincible. […] The … | Continue reading
Baby, it’s true. Toss your mushy clump of skin, blood, and bones together and we get the beautifully strange and wonderful package that combines to form you. Jokes and smarts, stutters and starts, smile and farts — we’re into your everything even though we probably don’t tell you … | Continue reading
Squeeze too much and you’re stuck with a syrupy red pool smeared across the side of your plate. Squeeze too little and you’ve got a cold and tasteless pile of potato blandness. Squeeze just right and you’re AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #336 Getting the perfect ketchup to fr … | Continue reading
Joey doesn’t have heat. Honestly, when I crashed at his cramped apartment a couple nights ago he welcomed me in wearing three sweaters and a set of chattering teeth while explaining that his apartment has no heat, so while he was glad I came over it was going to be a matter of se … | Continue reading
Hey, Mr. Bus Driver. Thanks for shortening our walk, thanks for making things easy, and thanks for breaking all the rules in the name of AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #338 When the bus driver stops the bus to let you off near your home appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things. | Continue reading
You’re a modern day explorer. Surfing electronic waves, battling pop-up storms, and sidestepping phishing nets, you’re mapping the distant shores of cyberspace. Soon it’s time to grab one of those extendable telescope things, climb the windy mast, and step into the little basket … | Continue reading
Born and blasted into the world you’re a baby brain with wide eyes, chubby legs, and cloudy thoughts. Mom lifts you and picks you, eyes open and close, and fogs rise and settle. Tears stream and faces scream as your swirling brain twists and turns into thoughts… Nothing makes sen … | Continue reading
You crack us up. Never stop being you. AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #341 Saying ‘See you next year!’ to everyone on new year’s eve and then laughing hysterically appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things. | Continue reading
Bathroom readers of the world, unite! It doesn’t matter if it’s an old issue of Reader’s Digest on top of the tank, yesterday’s crinkly newspaper lying on the floor, or a dog-eared comic book sitting on the bathroom counter. Nope, all that matters is now we don’t have to read the … | Continue reading
Now, now. Don’t get us wrong. It’s great filling the home with hugs and love and holiday joy. Everyone loves grandpas and grandmas and brand new toys. Yes, family fills living rooms with laughter, basements with board games, and kitchens with kisses. But let’s be honest — holiday … | Continue reading
After getting stuffed with stuffing and packed with potatoes someone kindly rolls you to the couch and covers you with old blankets and rogue scraps of wrapping paper for your post-holiday meal snooze. Yes, now it’s time to smile sweetly and pop outta your pants before spacing in … | Continue reading
Turn out the lights. Pull the curtains open and watch as jumbo snowflakes drift past the window, snow-covered kids walk by dragging sleds, and winter winds whisper through the evergreens. Smell the turkey crisping in the oven, listen to scratchy carols spinning in your head, and … | Continue reading
Wrapping is serious. Yes, somewhere between peeling tape, snipping corners, and curling ribbons you start obsessing over all the little details. And sure, if you’re like me your present just ends up a corner-dented patchwork of twisted tape and shoddy edges. But for the pros ther … | Continue reading
You’re running late. When it’s almost Christmas and there’s nothing under the tree it’s time to furrow your brows, steady your glare, and clench those fists for a big Super Present Power Shop. Yes, this is where you bust into the mall in a sweatshirt-and-running shoes tornado and … | Continue reading
Let’s get fat together. Roll those rum balls, sprinkle sparkles on the shortbread, and dump the bulk bag of candy canes in the crystal dish by the secretary’s desk. AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #348 That moment near the holidays when there’s suddenly cookies, chocolate, and … | Continue reading
It’s party time. And those Christmas sweaters are just the beginning. I mean sure, tossing on a thick woolly for the holiday party is a sure way to spread the cheer — especially if your sweater features hypnotic swirls of red and green, a giant floating snowman head, or an intens … | Continue reading
Thanks, jewelry box, random bar of soap, and chocolate orange. You came through in the clutch to help use the final shredded scrap of wrap. AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #350 Just barely wrapping a gift with that tiny scrap of leftover wrapping paper appeared first on 1000 A … | Continue reading
It’s time for some intergenerational egg nogging. Get ready to light the yule log, sail the gravy boat, and get your eighty-five pound grandmother a sloshy glass of rummy nog. Now, whatever your age, whatever your tastes, whatever your pleasures, whatever your fates, let’s all ag … | Continue reading
What do cellophane-wrapped mugs of mini candy canes, Season 3 of Mr. Belvedere on DVD, and framed photos of someone else’s dog have in common? They’re just what we never wanted. But that’s okay, that’s okay — because someone else might! Yes, now it’s time for some Regifting Magic … | Continue reading
AWESOME! Photos from: here, here, here, here, here, and here The post #353 Seeing Christmas trees through the window appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things. | Continue reading
Sidewalks bring us together. Fences split yards, lawns divide homes, and invisible property lines are scribbled on dusty blueprints in city archives. But somehow those little strips of concrete tie us all together and connect the dots between our lives. It’s a beautiful moment wh … | Continue reading
They’re not selling anything. Nope, Christmas lights on construction cranes just smile down on the city and cover us all in a warm and festive light. Flickering in the sky, flashing way up high, they hug us all together in a friendly yellow glow. On top of that, it’s sort of fun … | Continue reading
Ripped sleeves, tattered collars, and faded prints tossed in crumpled piles on the bedroom floor hold meaningful memories of tender touches. Twisting on the couch for a movie, stirring over the stove at dinner, or napping together in the park … all come together to fan the flames … | Continue reading
Look, I love babies. Sure, we laugh, high five, sing songs, and play cars. We talk, read books, dream dreams, and stare at stars. But one thing we agree to disagree on is proper behavior on overnight transatlantic flights. Me, I like sleeping. Them, they like screaming for hours … | Continue reading
It’s like getting away with something illegal. AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #358 When you sneeze and fart at the same time so nobody notices the fart appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things. | Continue reading
I’m listening to the wind, to the wind at my soul. Where it comes from, where it goes, well … who really knows. All I know is that the wind is a great part of life for a few big reasons: 1. Helps plants make love. Roots twist and tie bushes and trees into forest […] The post #359 … | Continue reading
After momentarily blinding yourself under a thick layer of muddy smears you suddenly gaze out with sparkly eyes and a dropped jaw through a crystal-clear half-circle of sunshine. It’s like getting a new set of eyes. AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #360 Finally cleaning your di … | Continue reading
Crystal flakes form in space before floating down from cloudy skies. Soon blankets of white coat sidewalks like icing and frosty corners freeze in shady yards by the shed. Scarves twist tightly around necks, noses sniffle and turn red, and everyone walks the streets with wide eye … | Continue reading
Life’s too short to make plans all the time. Just do what you want and enjoy it. AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #362 Not making plans appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things. | Continue reading
Sniffing bean dips, chewing brownies, inspecting casseroles for clues, you’re swishing and swallowing while channeling all your body’s powers towards your mouth. Make sure to close your eyes, sniff bunny sniffs, and slowly move that chewed-up paste around your tongue so it touche … | Continue reading
Water, water, everywhere. Most of our brains and our blood and our bodies are water. Most of our babies and our beagles and our baths are water. Water rinses apples and washes cars. Water steams carrots and cures SARS. (Study pending.) Yes, water cures thirst, shaves legs, and gr … | Continue reading
Hands up if you’ve ever been a bachelor. People, if you’ve been there you know the lazy-boned joy of sleeping in a bed half-covered in clothes, eating breakfast over the sink to avoid using one of your three plates, and getting dressed straight outta the dryer or laundry basket. … | Continue reading
Flex those spaghetti arms, grit those teeth, and look absolutely adorable. AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #366 Little kids showing you their muscles appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things. | Continue reading
Ring the bell. We’re supposed to run around. We’re not supposed to be still. We’re not supposed to be quiet. Pull out to our spinning planet swirling on its axis in the middle of our solar system. Pull out to us spinning around the sun flying through the ever-expanding blackness … | Continue reading
Big buildings full of flickering lights, faded paint on rusty water towers, and mirrory windows of familiar stores welcome you all the way back home… Smile and hit the gas as familiar feelings soak back into your brain. Smooth streets and bumpy sideroads, flashing orange lights a … | Continue reading
I have a fat wallet. Stuffed to the gills with plastic cards and old receipts it sort of looks like a messy paper sandwich. I barely squeeze it into my jeans and when I sit down it sharply jabs my leg, cutting off all blood supply from my femoral artery. Every couple of months I … | Continue reading
And driving it right out. AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #370 Backing your car in appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things. | Continue reading
It’s what life’s all about. Seeing old people holding hands is a symbol of a lifelong companionship full of knowing glances, inside smiles, and warm feelings in waiting hearts. As you watch them mosey down the boardwalk during the sunset you can’t help see the connection of two h … | Continue reading
Umbrella karma is when you lose your umbrella somewhere but then randomly find another one somewhere else. Whoops, left your rainshade in the restaurant? No worries, there’s an extra one in your front closet from last week’s party. Shoot, did you leave yours at the back of the bu … | Continue reading
Also known as the M&M Encore. AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #373 When you think you’re out of candy but then find one more left in the package appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things. | Continue reading
We’re all going down. People, it’s sad but it’s true: nothing’s gonna stop your big final drop. So live it up now, live it up large, because at the end of the day you aren’t really in charge. Look, we’re not spinning, gninnips, spinning on this wet rock for long, so let’s all enj … | Continue reading
Finding out someone shares a birthday with you feels like stars aligning, hearts criss-crossing, and lives twisting and tangling together. If they share your actual year it’s even more special because you grew up sharing moments and memories and histories and horoscopes, too. Lib … | Continue reading
Your brain is a machine. Yes, that soft and squishy lump is bursting with colors and pictures and people and places and smells and sights and sounds. Your brain knows things it hasn’t even told you yet. Sometimes it surprises you with forgotten flickers, crystal-clear connections … | Continue reading
Cavemen didn’t wear jeans. Nope, hiding from mammoths, bashing saber-tooth skulls, and setting up the cave was tough enough without furry leg-warmers chafing their hairy thighs. And, it wasn’t just them either: Free-legs living was The Thing To Do for the past hundred thousand ye … | Continue reading
Hit the gas, baby. You’re free. AWESOME! Photo from: here The post #378 Finally making it past whatever was causing traffic to slow down appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things. | Continue reading
Everybody’s got a classic. Buried in the basement, brass-framed in the family room, you’ve got a dusty 8×10 gem of a bad school photo featuring a bad school photo trend: • That laser background. Remember when the studio hired an acid junkie to paint that pink and blue laser backg … | Continue reading
While lying on the grass, lazing on the couch, or relaxing in some crumpled sheets, you sometimes just fall into the moment with someone you love. After the conversation dies down and the background noise fades away you smile silently and melt into an arms-and-legs embrace. Gaze … | Continue reading
Scrub those suds, baby. Work that hard square down to a soft-cornered bar. Work that soft-cornered bar down to smooth oval. Work that smooth oval down to a thin bar with deep creases. Work that thin bar with deep creases down to a jagged soap icicle. And then make a big decision: … | Continue reading